Would you leave a 9 and a 7 year old at home to nip to the shop?

[Justjax77]

I dragged my kids to the shop last night after Strictly for milk but they insisted I could have left them at home in front of the TV and they would be fine. The shop is about 3 minutes away. What would you do?

Basically if they think they’ll be fine they will be for 5 minutes, if you can hang the washing up in the back of the garden for 10 minutes I think they’ll be okay

Mm probably. Depending on the child. What you can do is get a second mobile in the house (or a landline). Call them and just keep the call going so they can shout for help or you can hear them being silly. Stick facetime on and point it at them watching telly.

Yes, I often leave my five and eight year old alone to pop to the corner shop. They know which neighbours to go to in an emergency. They are content playing or watching TV while I'm gone.

Is the three minutes by foot or in the car?
I would do it if by foot, but definitely not if by car.

Yes, I think this is fine. I leave my 9 & 11 year old home alone for up to 1.5 hours, and they are fine. They can call me if they need to.

This is mumsnet - most parents on here don’t leave their kids until they r about 28

My 9 year old would see this as an opportunity to do something absolutely ridiculous he’s never tried before, like fry an egg or boogie board down the stairs, so no I would not leave him!

At 8 ds was walking home from school by himself and by 9 he was walking to and from school so he could manage a few minutes at home by himself. Iirc by 9 I would leave him for about an hour at a time.

I don't entirely subscribe to the better safe than sorry idea tbh.

A certain amount of risk taking, reasonable responsibility and trust are all important for a child's development. I saw a talk recently that mentioned how large chidlren's areas where children felt 'ownership' of in the 50s, and how over the decades that has become smaller and smaller to the point of nothing for many, or no further than the corner shop. They asserted these diminishing horizons and changes in childhood play have contributed to the commonplace negative mental health outcomes.

There's some interesting reading about on how kids learn resilience and resolution skills when playing within peer groups without adult supervision or intervention.

Obviously it's a balancing act, and I'm sorry to leap on your comment (I'll put the soap box down now ) but I do think our natural and understandable desire to keep our children safe to the extent that is now normal, socialising online indoors, tracking apps etc doesn't always serve them long term. (Also not judging anyone that does this or uses trackers etc it's a balancing act and children and family needs are all different.)

Yes of course, just think what could happen if you take them outside. They could get hit by a car or fall on broken glass. Or they could see something traumatic in the street and be mentally damaged.
It's not worth the risk taking them out with you.
😂tongue in cheek, but you get the idea, you just need to make the best decision for your family and take a big dose of luck.

Yes I would, or I would send them to the shop. My 10 and 7 year old often walk to the local park and play there. My eldest has a phone if he needs me and its 5mins away. I live on a quite housing estate where everyone knows each other so its pretty safe up here.

@Stressfordays there's a park behind our house (3 min walk, not directly visible though) and my nearly 9 and 6 year olds are pushing to go by themselves. I'll hold out another year I think as there can sometimes be some less desirable kids there who might pick on them.
Do yours take a phone? I wonder if that would actually cause more problems than it's worth?

Did you know that if you have an Alexa, and download the app, you can check in on your device? So if you have a screen Alexa you can actually see your kids or with the other kinds you can hear them and talk to them.

I use it for my dog, but now thinking I could run to the shops 'checked in' to home Alexa and watch/check on my daughter too.

I wouldn’t.

BUT I know in places like Japan, the kids are walking or cycling to school independently at age 4 plus.

I also know my own mum and siblings used to be out unattended dawn to dusk and equally left at home.

So I don’t know if it’s just fear we’ve given to ourselves over generations and actually our kids should have more autonomy.

I used to leave my kids in the house to walk the dog for 45 mins at this age. They knew the drill:-

Don't answer the door
Don't play in the kitchen
Appropriate activities: Watch TV / Read a book / do ipad
Make sure they have their phone
For me:
Make sure everything's turned off
Lock the door

Yes I would do this.
children thrive on responsibility and being allowed to show how grown up they are.
it encourages maturity and responsibility.
they know where you are going,how long it will take and when you will be back.
they know not to touch the cooker the fire or matches and they know who lives next door should they need help.

No.

No

mine are 8 and 10. I’ll nip to the shop (about 2 minutes each way) but only if I know they’re on their screens otherwise they’ll fight! But if they’ve both got time on them it’s fine!!

Yes

No. The seven year old isn't old enough to be left by themselves. The nine year old is borderline (I wouldn't personally) but definitely not old enough to supervise the seven year old. Aged 11 and 9, if for under half and hour and if both sensible, then probably fine.

No - both too young IMO

Yes

Definitely not. But I have a 15 year old who attempted suicide when he was 12 so I am more anxious than most parents.

I would leave a 9 yo for 15 min but not a 7 yo