How to cope with DH laziness

[mumofone2022x]

Hi all,

NC for this one.

Our daughter is 18 months old. I had a very traumatic birth, don't have any family nearby So it's just me and DH and things have been tough.

Long story short, I have no idea how to motivate DH to be more involved and help more with dd. He never takes her out anywhere (without me anyway) I don't think he's ever taken it upon himself to take her to the park to give me a break or soft play etc. everything is down to me and I get that is usually the case with mum life. But it's almost like dd is a burden to dh most days. He doesn't enjoy parenting and he doesn't even have the motivation to play with her in the evenings etc,

I've questioned whether he's depressed but he won't go near the subject of emotions and never has. And to be honest I'm not sure that's the reasoning, he's perfectly happy in every other aspect and just seems he is perfectly happy letting me take full control and responsibility at all times.

He rarely gives her dinner at dinner time or lunch and he's never bathed her by himself.

I'm exhausted and so close to a mental breakdown. How can I make him see sense? Is it even worth trying?
I know things have been tough for us but seriously it shouldn't be like this should it?

Never thought he'd be so uninvolved.

Just looking for some advice maybe anyone else who's been here?

My ex did exactly this. All enthusiasm until ds arrived then nothing, He morphed into 1950s man, decided children were women's work. I think he changed about three nappies ever.

I tried everything, then gave up and we left when DS was three. Life was exhausting and depressing. I found being a single mum is much easier, life is much more joyful.

Ex is still the same, ten years later, sees DS but refuses to take him anywhere other than the local burger king. He's still furious that I left.

I'm not sure if it is bone idleness, a mind boggling lack of imagination or a genuine belief that children are women's work.

Eighteen months in, your dh won't change. You've been had. He wanted a free housekeeper and you're it. Cut your losses and leave. Give yourself a chance to meet someone decent and for your DD to have a proper family life..