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Parenting

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Single father

1 reply

Dad91D · 11/10/2022 15:40

Been a single parent 2yrs now. Last 10month solo. The ex is out of the state.

Just venting my struggle. For a long time, I was looking for someone to help ease the transition. Nothing really worked except me. Everything is a struggle. Raising 4 kids on my own. Things are a lot harder and very few rewards. Only happiness comes when I see the kids appreciate and honor me in return. My biggest sadness comes from being alone. Dating is hard, because other women want something from me which I cant do-money, time, traveling. Sorry, I cant go out and spending everything on them, when I got 4 kids who need more. my divorce guy friends tells me it gets easier. But when I look at their lives, I dont see anything better. Most still havent found anyone else or barely see their kids or dont have their own house. my kids keep getting older and want more things. And they know I cant afford it, but I try my best. They appreciate that. One day they will be gone and I will be alone. In the meantime, I am in charge of school, after school, doctors, friends gathering, sleepover, house repairs, etc, etc. Nothing for me really to do beyond that. I hope one day to be able to talk to someone again on a daily. See her face at night and morning again. A woman who makes me smile again. In the meantime, I go on alone and try my best. Even though, I know I will run out of resources soon and struggle even more.

OP posts:
Pr1mr0se · 12/10/2022 10:55

Hi, I read your post. It sounds like you are doing really well but need more adult company. I don't have much advice but things do get easier when the kids get older as they are more independent. As a parent it is incredibly difficult to say no to your own kids, but sometimes it is ok to be tired and just say no we can't do that event today. You sound a bit tired and depressed. Do try and keep up with your friends so you have some time with adults ....even if it's a playdate. Are you able to get a childminder or take it in turns with friends who are parents so you can have adult time and pick up on a hobby, evening class, go to the cinema or a meal with friends occasionally. They can look after your kids and theirs and then the next time you return the favour? A regular event (once a month for starters) for just you (not the kids) in the diary will help your state of mind.

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