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Parenting

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9-12 month developmental review

13 replies

RedHerring24 · 10/10/2022 16:03

A few weeks I got a letter through with an appointment for DD's 9-12month developmental review. There is a questionnaire to fill in before the appointment as well.

I've briefly gone through the questions in my head. So for fine and gross motor skills I can basically tick all the boxes.
But communication is lacking somewhat.
For the last few months all she has been interested in in crawling, pulling to stand, cruising across furniture and now wandering off with her walker. She isnt walking unaided yet but is very steady on her feet.
She can say mama and make noises but nothing that I would say are relatable sounds of letters.
Since reading the form Ive been really worried about the appointment.

For context, the last time I saw a HV was when DD was 4 weeks old.
I struggled breast feeding due to low supply and DD had an undiagnosed tongue tie.
HV told me I wasnt putting in enough effort with DD and needed to try harder. Then gave me a feeding plan which I was later told by a private midwife was dangerous and wasnt providing adequate nutrition.
I since made contact with HV centre as I had concerns over DD not taking to weaning well and was told to halve her milk intake to force her to eat. Which we didnt do for obvious reasons.

Each time Ive had any dealings with HV Ive felt awful and I now feel really anxious about this appointment. I feel like Ill be told again im not putting in the effort etc etc etc.
Im honestly trying so so hard with her and I think she is actually doing well otherwise.

Will HV do anything about the lack of babble from DD or is this more for monitoring?
What have others experienced?
Please calm my nerves.

OP posts:
washingbasketqueen · 10/10/2022 16:22

You don't say how old your dd is? Assuming she's under one, she sounds like she's doing great. Try not to worry.

RedHerring24 · 10/10/2022 16:23

Sorry! She is currently 10months. Review will be when she turns 11 months.
Thats quite a vital piece of info isnt it!!

OP posts:
Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas · 10/10/2022 16:29

Not walking isn’t a concern until 18 months.
Most babies don’t do the review until 12 months. If by then you are still worried you can self refer to speech and language therapy. Remember she isn’t expected to be able to do everything on the form.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas · 10/10/2022 16:30

Is this what you are looking at?
www.somerspediatrics.com/media/1016/asq-12-month-english.pdf

RedWingBoots · 10/10/2022 16:33

We didn't bother with our DD's one year review but did do the two year one. It was a questionnaire done over the phone. This is because we wanted our DD's eyes tested.

The reviews aren't compulsory but are there to pick up developmental issues. So if you think your child has a developmental issue e.g. hearing issue, sight problem then attend the review, otherwise make up some polite excuse and don't attend.

Incidentally we never used a walker with our DD. I have family members and close friends who work in child health and they don't recommend them for safety reasons.

RedHerring24 · 10/10/2022 17:10

@Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas yes that is the form we have which I think is just standard. To be honest Ibwasnt worried about her development until I read the form and the communicarion section just made me panic that she is behind.
Obviously all babies develop at different rates so jope this will be taken into consideration at the appointment rarher than just being told she is behind.

@RedWingBoots i wasnt sure if they were compulsary or not to be fair, just assumed they were. I guess i just feel very apprehensive given the previous experiences with HV.
As for the walker, it was gifted to us from a friend. We dont let DD ever use it unsupervised and one of us is always behind her with a hand on her to prevent her falling etc. She doesnt just go off by herself which is what my first post sounded like!

OP posts:
Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas · 10/10/2022 18:43

RedHerring24 · 10/10/2022 17:10

@Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas yes that is the form we have which I think is just standard. To be honest Ibwasnt worried about her development until I read the form and the communicarion section just made me panic that she is behind.
Obviously all babies develop at different rates so jope this will be taken into consideration at the appointment rarher than just being told she is behind.

@RedWingBoots i wasnt sure if they were compulsary or not to be fair, just assumed they were. I guess i just feel very apprehensive given the previous experiences with HV.
As for the walker, it was gifted to us from a friend. We dont let DD ever use it unsupervised and one of us is always behind her with a hand on her to prevent her falling etc. She doesnt just go off by herself which is what my first post sounded like!

That form is for babies who are 12 months old. You have a full 3 months to go.

RedHerring24 · 10/10/2022 20:09

@Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas
Theyre doing her review on the day she turns 11 months so I would hope they will take this into consideration?

OP posts:
catsnore · 10/10/2022 20:36

I've found that health visitors vary from lovely to horrible and competent to incompetent! Don't set too much store by previous experiences. Do the review if you want to - it can be good to discuss where your child is and what the next milestones are. You can ask any questions - I remember asking about food strategies etc as my first dd wouldn't eat much meat and I discussed that with them. They give you advice but it's obviously not compulsory. It sounds like your little one is completely fine and there's no need to worry xxx

Dipsydoodlenoodle · 11/10/2022 19:55

Sounds exactly like me. My baby hasn't babbled at all...she just cane out with the 'words' rather than babbling.

At 8 months I was told my baby didn't need milk (!), so like you I'm wondering what this appointment will be like.

My only saving grace so far is that the hv coming out to me isn't the one we had originally (I wasn't keen) and sounded nice on the phone.

My baby is a very confident walker, if she's holding your finger...but on her own, shes only managed a few wobbly steps...she can crawl quickly, and does exactly that.

ChildWontStopGrowing · 11/10/2022 20:24

They'll ask you questions and give her a "score" which will either be fine, grey, or red. Grey means they give you exersizes to encourage development on the area in question, then call you in a few weeks for an update. Red means a referal to a specialist.

You don't actually have to go - they offer their assistance to everyone but you are absolutely allowed to decline. I've never had a problem with my HVs, but there are plenty of stories on here resulting in them holding very low esteem in the eyes of the community!

Regarding communication, I thought my son would have a low score. But my HV was happy with him making 3 different babbles and it didn't have to relate to anything. They aren't expected to have their first proper word until 12-18 months anyway.

RedHerring24 · 13/10/2022 10:23

Thank you everyone for your comments.
I do want to go for the appointment because it is about my child and her development. I guess I am just worried because of previous experiences which really affected my mental health. Being told youre not making enough effort as a first time mum when youre actually really unwell from birth complications hit hard and I struggled.
DH has said he will come along too for a bit of support which will help.

Having said DD isnt really babbling, the last few days she has been making some more noises. Nothing i can make sense of but sounds rather than screeching or growling is good i think!

OP posts:
SatinHeart · 13/10/2022 10:32

There was a huge difference between the things mine could do on the day we received the questionnaire and what they could do by the day of the appointment! They change so fast at that age. That's why they give you a couple of weeks to work on it.

In my experience they won't do much about communication at that age, just tell you to sing more nursery rhymes. But if there do turn out to be actual speech and language problems down the line (and chances are there won't), at least its noted on their health record whether or not there were concerns around age 1.

The very fact that you are concerned makes you a good mum 💐

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