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Advice needed please

5 replies

Yellowdiamond10 · 05/10/2022 12:29

Hi I had a little girl around 12 weeks ago. It's not been a smooth ride as she had an allergy that went misdiagnosed until 6 weeks but she has finally started to settle! I stay at home whilst my partner goes to work but when he comes home I still have my LO 90% of the time! I do all of the night feeds including when he isn't at work (he has done one night with her and that's due to me forcing him as i was exhausted in the beginning. She has now started sleeping a lot better only really waking for 1 or 2 feeds between going to bed at 8:30 and getting up at around 7:00. I do the feeds and also get up with her even on weekends he has lay ins... I'm starting to resent this as I feel one day of the weekend he could either do the feeds or get up with her in the morning to allow me a lay in. He has another daughter and when she is here (50% of the time) I am left to do everything also as he says she is his priority so 80% of his time is spent with her! He does no chores other than put the bins out or cook dinner a couple of times a week and it's starting to make me feel like a maid and a single mum. I have tried talking to him but he just shoots me down and makes me feel like I am in the wrong for even suggesting it! What can I do, I am at my wits end with it all?

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
MolliciousIntent · 05/10/2022 12:30

You tell him that if he doesn't get his shit together, you'll leave, and you mean it.

Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas · 05/10/2022 12:31

Have you talked to him about it?

Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas · 05/10/2022 12:33

Sorry ignore my last message! I hadn’t finished typing. Have you sat him down and talked to him about it properly and how it isn’t acceptable. Before you decided to ttc and when you were pregnant did you discuss what it would be like when then babu arrives?

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Yellowdiamond10 · 05/10/2022 12:36

Yes and he says he does help but this is only when I ask him a number of times (and then I get accused of nagging). He makes out that I can go for a shower alone or when she is awake but then rolls his eyes and said I could do it in nap time! The only time I get to myself is when she is asleep and even then the house is a mess, bottles need washing and sterilising etc x

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Yellowdiamond10 · 05/10/2022 12:37

Yes and he assured me we would be a team but we are far from it x

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