Did you breastfeed? Did it hurt?

[Rachell1]

Hi ladies,

I am preparing for baby number 2 and really really want some advice re breastfeeding.

I pathetically attempted to breastfeed my first for about 2/3 days and gave up because…

1. After just a few feeds on day 1 my nippples were stinging and extremely painful
2. It took one midwife in particular to help get him to latch, me alone and the other midwives could not do it.. he just was not having it at all…
3. I was too exhausted to keep crying and stressing about it (hence why this time I want to go into breastfeeding with some knowledge!)

I was very very upset that I had to stop so soon and really want to try this time round.

So my main 3 questions are…

1. Should I hand express colostrum prior to giving birth so that I at least have some syringes ready in case of latching issues
2. What do I do if baby has the same latching issues as the first, where even midwives aren’t much help?
3. Is it meant to hurt THAT much? If not, what do I do to prevent this?

Any further tips and advice are very much welcome!

Thank you

If finances allow get an IBCLC who is also a tongue tie practioner on speed dial and get them out the minute you get into difficultly. Best £250 I ever spent (London so likely cheaper elsewhere and would have been less if she had found no tongue tie). Totally saved my breastfeeding journey.

I breastfed both my babies. Both times, at first, my nipples were very, very sore. I just gritted my teeth and after awhile it stopped. I looked a it this way; before formula would we just let our babies starve to death because of some initial soreness? For some reason that helped me persevere.

My daughter in law just gave birth a few weeks ago and was nervous to breastfeed as her mother didn't and neither did her sisters. She didn't have much confidence in her own body producing enough milk, but hung in there and now thinks it's the best thing ever. Her nipples were sore at first, but she told me after he sucked for awhile the soreness went away and now it's gone for good.

I was really trying my best to give her encouragement and confidence about everything, not just BF, because her own mother is NC. I told her that her body just made an entire baby and it's capable of feeding it.

I had no trouble with my babies latching, they seemed know what to do better than I did. I loved breastfeeding because it calmed me down, made me feel tranquil, it was easy as pie - no preparing bottles or clean up. I could take my babies anywhere with just a few diapers stuffed in my pockets. Also, I'm a bit lazy.

My first breastfed until he was almost 12 months old and then quit on his own. My youngest was about 23 months old and also quit himself. They just need it less and less.

With both of mine I've found Silverette cups the best thing for relieving sore nipples. You tuck them inside your bra (you need a breast pad too) and something about the silver speeds the healing. Magic. It does still take a few days for them to toughen up though. Get the baby checked for tongue tie early if it's too sore and get it sorted privately rather than wait for the NHS.

Yes, both babies. It hurt intensely for the first ten seconds or so of every feed at first - proper, gritting teeth in agony pain - but that did pass. I used loads of Lansinoh which helped. Don’t wait for your nipples to get sore before using it, start it right away. Someone told me that if you can stick it out for six weeks it gets so much better and she was right. After that I found it so easy and it was great only having to take a nappy and spare clothes in case of poonamis out with me and not worry about taking bottles etc.

Jesus, that’s the most judgmental and spectacularly unhelpful post I’ve seen in a while. What happened to you to make you so nasty?!

Yip both times. First time my milk never came in and I gave up after a week. It was so painful every single time so I was quite glad no milk meant I had to give up. I had no idea it wld be sore. Bleeding nipples, crying baby that wouldn't latch gd and a crying mummy with the pain!

It was exactly the same with baby 2 but I had already decided I wld just do a few days to give the colostrum. This time my milk came in and wow that was quite painful too but not as bad as actually feeding.

I've just started a course on breastfeeding and we watched this video. You might find it helpful regarding attachment and positioning.

Warning it does use the phrase breastmilk is best for your baby, but please see that in the context of this video where formula might not be an alternative.

My DC1 had an undiagnosed tongue tie. It was very painful for weeks and weeks (months really) - luckily he gained well and I was just too stoic and kind of kept thinking it must just be on the cusp of getting better... and then eventually it really did, although not until around 5 months. I really tried to get support but I stopped short of really accessing true specialists (either IBCLC or LLL etc) - midwives, HVs and the NHS drop in were not very helpful. The best help I got, which actually enabled me to keep going, was right here on mumsnet. I realise in retrospect I probably appeared to be coping better than I actually was. The best help I got, which actually enabled me to keep going, was right here on mumsnet.

A different HV glanced at him at around 9 months and said 'oh, he's got tongue tie hasn't he - how has that been?'

Anyway- whilst that was all shit and probably ill-judged on my part, and definitely contributed to my shit MH throughout his babyhood and early toddlerhood, we did get through it and fed until he self weaned at four, for which I am very grateful.

With DC2 it was easy from the start. Uncomfortable sometimes at the very beginning (tiny newborn months and engorged breasts is such an awkward combination!) but maybe my nipples were toughened already and certainly I knew what I was doing, she didn't have a tongue tie, I was vigilant about relatching when needed, and I also deliberately didn't offer both sides at every feed (controversial - my babies both gained really quickly so I felt confident in it, the main reason was trying to avoid reflux but a nice bonus was that each nipple got twice as long a rest between feeds and I think that did make a difference).

I breastfed for about 3 years, the first 3 months hurt - I'd set a goal to do it for 12 weeks then quit. But I found once I reached that goal it had stopped hurting.

In those early days I had lots of tears over the pain, I used nipple shields and lanisoh cream and spent lots of time reading la leche league advice. I loved breastfeeding once I'd got past that painful stage.

I never had much luck expressing.

My first has no tongue tie and good latch and my nipples still really hurt/ sore/ felt like they were cracking and on fire the first two three weeks. Constant application of nipple cream helped. Breastfed her for 15 months. Had a few months break from breastfeeding and then baby number 2 latched on right away with no pain or anything, nipples have been desensitised already. Persevere for a few weeks and it will (hopefully) get better. All the best with your new baby!

If it doesn’t work for you OP, that’s ok too.

For me, it was absolute fucking agony. And the way I was pressured and pressured to keep going means I’m still quite triggered and upset. I should have a stopped earlier.

That’s so rude. She’s come here for help and advice like literally everyone else on these boards at some point or another. Plus you are completely wrong. NO it does not necessarily hurt. I never had any pain whatsoever and a lot of people have the same experience

I wasn't able to express colostrum, hand expressing really never worked for me and I couldn't get a hang of the hakaa either. For me it was painful for about the first 6 weeks, sometimes excruciatingly so. There were times when I had to stop breastfeeding on one side and only pump for a day to give that nipple a break. The mama love nipple butter was a life saver (doesn't need to be wiped off between feeds) and I used the Medela hydrogel pads as well. Also going topless helped! My husband (and mom when she was around) was massively supportive and would help me with positioning and getting water and a snack and recording the feeds in a shared app. I did a couple phone consultations with a hippie lactation consultant which soothed me but probably didnt provide as much practical benefit as just the passage of time and getting acclimated. The first 6 weeks were hard but since then (baby is 19 mos) I think breastfeeding has generally been easier than bottle feeding.

1. Have some syringes on stand by just in case
2. Get yourself to see a lactation specialist. Your midwife team will be able to refer you to a clinic and some will even come to your house. I found the midwives in hospital had no idea how to show me correctly and it was EXTREMELY painful.
3. No I don’t think it ‘should’ hurt. I was in excruciating pain at the hospital and until day 5 post partum. Cracked nipples, toe curling pain every time I fed baby. Then on day 5 I went to see a lactation consultant and within 15 minutes she showed me how to latch baby on correctly and since that day I never had any pain going forward.

Ooooh the haaka was amazing.

For me it hurt for the first few weeks, lots of nipple cream (the one in the purple tube) helps. It's really hard to start with but if you manage to power through it gets easier the longer you do it.

With my second I expressed before she was born, and it was nice to have something less to worry about. With my first we got into a horrible cycle where he was to tired to feed but to hungry to sleep. A couple of syringes of colostrum really helped avoid that happening second time.

I was fortunate enough not to have any major latching issues, so can give any practical advice there but I would suggest looking up what suport groups you have locally now, as you won't have the energy later.

I didn't bother expressing before birth.

My first had trouble latching - the midwives were good at helping. I didn't leave hospital till I could latch her a but better, it still took time though. You could have some contact details of local breastfeeding groups for once you are home. My second didn't have any latching issues.

It didn't hurt me unless the latch was wrong. Then I'd re-latch.

Lots of great advice on here. Definitely look up your local IBCLC consultant.
Follow Kathryn Stagg on Instagram, I find her posts really useful. Expect the first few weeks to hurt, but it will get easier.

Yes, the first few weeks were really painful. They say the first few sucks are "strong", but a few times I had to bite my lip to stop from screaming. It gradually got easier over time; your nipples get less sensitive until it's not painful at all.

Sometimes it IS position that's the problem; so pay attention to that. As you feed you get to tell the difference between position pain and first suck pain.

Get Lansiloh nipple gel. It gives INSTANT relief and you don't have to wipe it off before the next feed.

The first 2 weeks are definitely the hardest. During that time I didn't know how I would manage for 12 months (I always said I wanted to do a year), but after 2 weeks it got a lot easier.

Yes it was incredibly painful for the first one and didn't get better until I started using lansinoh and nipple shields. Awful bleeding cracked nipples, one night it looked like a chunk had come off! Don't know if I imagined that in a sleep deprived state. Second one still hurt a bit for the first few weeks too but I was better prepared. It didn't hurt at all after the first few weeks and I feel like it's because my babies mouths grew bigger too, I don't know if that's a real thing or not. Worth sticking with it for me because doing bottles would have been a massive inconvenience for me as it was mostly me looking after them in the first year. Being able to pop them on whenever I needed a bit of peace or had to travel on public transport was a godsend. Get some lansinoh and put it on constantly