Deferred school start for ASD child

[Electricalstress]

My dd is very clearly autistic. She’s summer born as well. We have discussed and decided an extra year at home (which means a year later starting school nursery) will be best for her. We haven’t ruled out home education if necessary.

We do plenty of activities and groups and want her to have have time to develop at her own pace.

We feel pushed by everyone to send her to nursery now it seems the more apparent her difficulties have become the more everyone is saying ‘send her to nursery’ but we don’t feel it’s what’s right for her .
previously my HV was really pushing it and we had to end up making the decision to decline further input from the service.

I’ve booked some more classes and we’ve been going to sensory sessions which are amazing. Dd responds when I’m there as she feels safe and secure.

Does anyone have any other advice or suggestions of activities or classes etc that may be helpful
Tia

Sorry I also meant to add (forgot to say as I’m sleep deprived and forgetful!) any other advice re the deferred school start - our LA seems good with this as I know other s who have done this only for being Summer born with no SEN but do I need to talk to individual schools

Hello! Mum of autistic girl here! I think deferring school is a great idea and I would have done for my daughter if she’d been summer born.

I did send mine to nursery but it was a very small setting, lots of adults, only 3 hours a day (term time only). She liked it. She started doing an hour a day and gradually built up to 3. Other than giving me a break I’d say it was helpful as she got used to the idea of leaving me / going to a school type setting. it 100% made the transition to school easier. The other useful thing was that she got put on a Support Plan which then was already in place for school. I would research preschools near you as you may get lucky and find a nice supportive environment.

Is her referral for diagnosis underway? One issue with not being in nursery is that you won’t have the nursery’s evidence to support diagnosis.

Have you applied for DLA?

look into schools now and try to find the most inclusive kind school you can that has experience of autism. I also got lucky in terms of where I live and ages in a mainstream school with lots of other autistic kids. It’s not been plain sailing but at least she has friends and as she grows is with like minded peers.

likely you will also want to apply for an EHCP at some point and again being in an educational setting would be helpful.

sorry just read your post again. You don’t say how old she is. I didn’t send my daughter to nursery till she was 2.9 and I’m so grateful that I did that. No way was she ready for it before. On reflection I wish I’d waited till a year later (the year before starting reception).

however the huge caveat to that is that I did need the nursery evidence for her diagnosis I think.

good luck and you know her best. Don’t be bullied by others - I remember myself people going on about nursery when she was younger and how great it was. Well it wouldn’t have been for my baby who was seriously distressed by kids crying, loud noises, unpredictability etc

My Y3 child doesn't have ASD but is Summer born. He is a whole year behind his peers. I heartily wish that I had had the confidence to keep him back a year. If I had he would be thriving now rather than seriously struggling 😞

There’s a Facebook group called Flexible School Admissions for Summer Borns that has lots of useful advice on deferred school starts. Might be worth a look if you’re on Facebook.

When you say school nursery do you mean reception year (the academic year in which the child turns 5)?

If you mean anything prior to school reception definitely dont do it if you think it won't work. She's getting out and about and that's plenty.

If you do mean school reception that's more tricky. It's the year in which they're carefully introduced to school life and larger classes, learn to take instruction and sit at desks. If she went straight from nothing to year 1 she may really, really struggle.

You say she has autistic traits not diagnosis. Asd is a spectrum, nearly everyone has some traits and they're more common as normal behaviour in children (lack of attention, shyness, misunderstanding, repetition, etc) . Get her diagnosed to see if she's genuinely noticeably on the spectrum for her age and so you can access help.

My asd DS was diagnosed at under 18 months so it's never too early if you think the signs are there.

Asd diagnosis at 5 here, full time school nursery class the year she was five ( 0845 to 1445 school lunch given). Small very structured, routine based class, emphasis on nurturing and social skills, lots of adults. Enhanced transition to primary. Best decision ever. Loves school. Has the confidence and maturity to learn quickly. Is with same kids as nursery so is comfortable with peers although social relationships remain difficult.
Was on schools radar already so early help and awareness in place.
When she first started nursery pre diagnosis I felt I wanted her with me as much as possible but it's been brilliant for her confidence and just having that consistency in people and routine helps her get there in her own time.
I think it dies depend on the setting very much. I wouldn't have wanted her in a large day cate setting and she wouldn't have coped.
Hope this helps.

If the health visitor advised you to send DD to nursery, then I would do that. The basic reason is that the longer you delay including your DD in the education system, the longer it will take for "the system" to recognise her needs and to get her support in place.

Your DD is not going to outgrow her autism in a year. Unless you want to home school her in the long term she needs to start at nursery now so they can identify and evaluate her needs for the future, e.g. if she is likley to cope in mainstream or needs a special school place or if she needs additional support in class.

And as a pp pointed out, when you say she is "very clearly autistic" does that mean she is diagnosed? If she has not yet been diagnosed then a nursery will help with her assessment. They can give extra input on her social and intellectual development, and back up the referral.

I have a summer born girl with ASD diagnosed at age 3 through her preschool. We did defer her and she spent an extra year in a school attached preschool 5 mornings a week and one lunch per week. Where she recieved 121 sessions with a staff memeber every day for help with S&L in accordance with her EHCP. She also recieved Nursery Plus sessions at preschool and Portage sessions in our home once a week. As well has seeing an NHS SALT therapist once a week at the local hospital. She was allocated a space at a SEN school and started the following September.

Only just turned 2 so quite young. We’ve had a SALT referral and referral to community paediatrician but we may go private as have older dc with asd and found the nhs system dreadful with our others (it might just be our area but it was horrendous).

We just know as we have older dc with asd and dd seems to be really struggling. In a way I feel like at least we can identify it so early now and get a diagnosis and support but I’ve been quite upset this time