Questions for parents of three or more...

[hattyyellow]

Would welcome any pratical experiences or advice.

We have twin girls aged 2.5. Would love to have a third but feel panicked at the thought of having two toddlers and a newborn...

Wondered about the following...I feel knackered today after having been up several times in the night with toddlers having nightmares...how do you find the energy to be up in the night with a small baby as well?

Are you running on adrenalin for the first six months? Is that what keeps you going and gets you and toddlers and baby washed/dressed/breakfasted out of the door to pre-school/nursery/playgroup etc?

If you can't catch up on sleep during the day with having toddlers as well as housework etc to do...do you catch up at weekends? Catch up ever?!

We would have no help as no family who can help nearby...have friends nearby but they have small children of their own so can't expect too much of them...

I would need to go back to work at least part-time about 4 months after baby was born - am I mad?

Is it normal to feel nervous at the thought of 3? Because I got two babies first time around I never did the one toddler and one baby stage so it's not a gradual transition moving from 1 to 2 to 3 children...

Any thoughts/experiences of how you get through the night and day gratefully recieved...I'm really interested in getting a fuller picture about how life with three works...

We have 3

A severely autistic 8 year old
A 6 year old
A 3 year old

All boys.

TBH I have found having 3 far harder work than having 2, although I think in part that's because ds1 has become a lot harder to handle over the last few years. So have the combination of a stroppy just turned 3 year old and a severely autistic non-verbal 8 year old. Gone the passive 3 year old I had when ds2 was a baby. Sleep? ds1 is and always will be the main culprit. The other 2 sleep well. ds3 had a few bad days when he was small, but it's such a short time (few months, year max) that I think its just something that you deal with.

ds2 was an elective section, so arranged for my MIL to be there to look after ds1. DS3 was a section after trial of labour but we were living near my Mum by then so she came into help out. Because of ds1's autism we didn't bring him to scans for ds3 (although we did when pregnant with ds2- when he was passive), can't remember about ds2 when I was pregnant with ds3 - I didn't have many. One I think.

I think taking to scans depends on the child. I can't remember if we took ds2 but he would have been no problem- ds3 another issue entirely, and I would avoid taking him probably. Different personalities.

It probably would have been good hatty if it hadn't gone hideously wrong. DD suffered a lack of oxygen and was blue lighted to hospital and has been left severely disabled.
But I reckon my teens wont ever forget contraception now, having seen birth and all its messiness

I found the transition from 2 to 3 much easier than from 1 to 2. Having just had number 4, I agree you make your choices and get on with it (doesn't make it easy, but helps to have a positive attitude). Do as much as you can the night before to prepare for the next morning.

Now I've read this thread, I want two more!

Yep, you will be tired, but aren't you already? If you are up with toddlers, you might as well be up with a baby too.

We have no family or support, but we do have a cleaner. DP does the school run most mornings.

Foxy I can see a cleaner would be a good bet..my SIL calmly informed me that if we had a third they would like to pay for a cleaner to come now and then for the first 6 months as their gift to us ...

needmorecoffee I'm so sorry to hear it went so wrong

yurt thank you, that's really useful stuff..interesting to see that of course things change depending on how old the kids are...

Just need to get pregnant now! Roll on ovulation....

I have 3 dc. 4, 2 and 5 months. I have no family locally. I took dd to scans but would never have taken ds (they would not have had any working equipment left!) so arangement scans for when he was at nursery. The hospital were happy to have children in the scans as long as there was another adult there.

I was induced with no. 2 and 3 so could arrange for people to have the other dc. But also had friends on standby.

I think you would find one baby easy, and remember although you've got toddlers now, in 9 months your dts will be over 3 and will be able to entertain each other while you do baby stuff. My 2 older dc have become quite self sufficient since I had ds2.

Good luck ttc