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Original poster

Desperate...6 m preg & 11m old won't sleep in cot

10 replies

annamaria22 · 01/10/2022 12:07

My 11 month old daughter’s independent sleep is going down hill and is now literally non existing unless in the pram or car seat.
She used to be able to go to sleep on her own in the cot with a bottle up until 6 months ish. Now I would rock her to sleep and she will wake up as soon as I put her down in her cot and she would cry until I pick her up again and would give in and put her in our bed after a several attempts and lots of tears (she sleeps through the night without bottles when sleeping with us) . I am 6 months pregnant with number 2 and we are DESPERATE to get her to sleep on her own as we can’t have the two babies waking each other up at night. Any suggestion is appreciated! We’ve tried the Ferber method but when she cries she’s usually so scared that she ends up pooing so I have to change her anyway. Does anyone have any suggestions in how to get her to fall asleep on her own and in her own cot or how to break the cycle without too much tears?

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KangarooKenny · 01/10/2022 12:10

She needs to learn to go to sleep in the cot, and don’t give her bottles in there.
It will take some time but you need to commit to it.
Put her in the cot and sit next to her, you pat and soothe her but do not talk to her or pick her up. No eye contact. She will cry to begin with. Stick with it.
Eventually you will be able to sit next to the cot, then move further away.

MGee123 · 01/10/2022 13:06

As per above. Draw a line under rocking her to sleep (bedtime and naps) and do not go back to it. Use other ways to settle her but she must be in her cot.

ChildWontStopGrowing · 01/10/2022 16:56

How long did you try the ferber method? Sleep training is all about consistency. You have to grit your teeth and put up with the tears for a few weeks and DO NOT put her in your bed. All that's doing is teaching her that crying will get her what she wants.

If she is consistently needing changing when you're trying to settle then maybe a different method is the way to go.

(when I was on day 2 of sleep training I was in pieces and utterly heartbroken, searching alternative methods online. I powered through and it was 100% worth it because it WORKED)

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Original poster
annamaria22 · 02/10/2022 04:54

KangarooKenny · 01/10/2022 12:10

She needs to learn to go to sleep in the cot, and don’t give her bottles in there.
It will take some time but you need to commit to it.
Put her in the cot and sit next to her, you pat and soothe her but do not talk to her or pick her up. No eye contact. She will cry to begin with. Stick with it.
Eventually you will be able to sit next to the cot, then move further away.

Thank you, we will try this!

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Original poster
annamaria22 · 02/10/2022 04:54

MGee123 · 01/10/2022 13:06

As per above. Draw a line under rocking her to sleep (bedtime and naps) and do not go back to it. Use other ways to settle her but she must be in her cot.

Thank you

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bangpi · 02/10/2022 05:03

Is this not the benefit of having babies closer together. Yes it's harder but you don't need no 1 sleeping through. She's still a baby. It will be hard but so amazing having 2 little ones. The first doesn't need to grow up to make space for no2. Get them in your bed, snuggle them until they sleep. It's hard but you will always love these moments when they grow up.

Original poster
annamaria22 · 02/10/2022 10:17

bangpi · 02/10/2022 05:03

Is this not the benefit of having babies closer together. Yes it's harder but you don't need no 1 sleeping through. She's still a baby. It will be hard but so amazing having 2 little ones. The first doesn't need to grow up to make space for no2. Get them in your bed, snuggle them until they sleep. It's hard but you will always love these moments when they grow up.

I'm sure it will be wonderful in the long run but my issue isn't her sleeping through the night right now, it's that she won't even go down in her cot which means we need to go to bed when she goes to bed.

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Dipsydoodlenoodle · 02/10/2022 19:55

I can't help much but my 10.5 month old has been like this, waking screaming in the night and not settling until she's in bed with me...however,the last few nights she's still woke up but has been happy to go back to sleep in her own bed quickly...basically, I think its a phase unfortunately.

Calphurnia88 · 03/10/2022 08:24

ChildWontStopGrowing · 01/10/2022 16:56

How long did you try the ferber method? Sleep training is all about consistency. You have to grit your teeth and put up with the tears for a few weeks and DO NOT put her in your bed. All that's doing is teaching her that crying will get her what she wants.

If she is consistently needing changing when you're trying to settle then maybe a different method is the way to go.

(when I was on day 2 of sleep training I was in pieces and utterly heartbroken, searching alternative methods online. I powered through and it was 100% worth it because it WORKED)

Did you not read the part where the baby was so scared she pooed herself?

FFS.

Original poster
annamaria22 · 03/10/2022 09:50

Dipsydoodlenoodle · 02/10/2022 19:55

I can't help much but my 10.5 month old has been like this, waking screaming in the night and not settling until she's in bed with me...however,the last few nights she's still woke up but has been happy to go back to sleep in her own bed quickly...basically, I think its a phase unfortunately.

Maybe its a development thing cause I read similar posts with that happening around this age. Let's hope it passes and we can get a little bit of sleep again 😅

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