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Is this sort of toddler behaviour normal?

3 replies

Bethann85 · 29/09/2022 16:44

So I am a first time mum, to a 2.8 year old boy whom I love dearly, but since he was probably about 15 months old, I have found him increasingly difficult to look after.

He sleeps well, but he is rarely happy. He moans and whines more than 50% of the time, and if we do something fun he enjoys it at the time, say if we go swimming, but afterwards he will start moaning in the car again.

He is very aware of what's going on around him, if he heard a noise that's slightly loud, he'll say "what was that!?!?", or if someone leaves the room "where have they gone!?" in a very 'I must know' kind of way. I know people will say that's normal but to me he just seems too interested.

I see other children who seem so much more innocent and content with their little lives. My DS always seems irritated and on the edge of a tantrum pretty much all the time.
DH and I really give him lots of attention, and he goes to nursery 4 days a week where he has a great time apparently.

I constantly worry it's me, and that I must be doing something wrong to have created such a miserable toddler. I've tried every avenue to cheer him up, humour, tickles, being silly, "come on let's get on with it" kind of attitude, increased discipline, you name it I've tried it.

Can I expect him to chill out a bit more around 3? Any tips or experience would be greatly appreciated! Xx

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pjani · 29/09/2022 17:14

Sounds pretty normal to me. I have a very serious DC and that’s just what’s he like. You may have quite a sensitive soul. I’m sure there’s a ‘flip’ of these character tics that are positive eg he’s observant, he cares a lot about different things, he seems to know his own mind.

Are you getting him to do lots of activities when he might be tired abs want to chill at home? 4 days at nursery might be tiring for him.

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ShadowPuppets · 29/09/2022 17:18

They’re so funny aren’t they? I have had two insanely grumpy babies and the first has become a very chilled toddler but friends who had very relaxed babies are now having grumpy toddlers. They really are their own masters at that age.

That said even for my chilled toddler, nothing you’ve said strikes me as unusual. As soon as she’s tired or cold or hungry or bored the wingeing starts! That said I’m pretty much the same and I’m 33 so I just assume she’s inherited it 🙈

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ShadowPuppets · 29/09/2022 17:19

Oh meant to add snacks after swimming are an essential in this family! You may already be doing it but there’s usually a tangerine offered in the car on the way home for a swim in order to avoid tantrums 🙈

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