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Don't know what's going on

10 replies

wowokaythen · 26/09/2022 21:10

...or what category to put this in but please share your thoughts with me I feel like I'm losing my sanity 🤣

We move house soon, LB is 8 months old. He's still in our room with us, I've done every night feed since day 1. My partner doesn't wake up to him crying at all, ever. (He doesn't wake to bangs/the dogs barking or anything. Many mornings I have to nudge him to turn his alarm clock off)

So we were talking about when we move and I just said how the bedroom can only be in a particular layout because it's alot smaller than our current room, and when we move LB is going into his own room, so I said I'd like to stay on the side of the bed I'm currently on, as it is closer to the door, so that when he wakes for night feeds/if he wakes because of teething etc, it's easier for me to get up and to him in the night. The space to walk around the bed won't be much there will be about a foot at the bottom.

When I said this, my partner almost flipped and said it's not fair - he said " why should I have to walk around when I get up for work in the morning" so I said - well the same applies to me for getting up during the night multiple times??

His argument is that LB won't get up forever, to which I said but we can't guarantee a time when he will stop, so for now it makes sense for me to be closer to just make it easier for me, he just keeps saying 'no you can just climb over me'

So he seems to think it's ok for me to have to climb over/walk around multiple times in the night but not okay for him to walk around once in the morning?🤦‍♀️

He then went onto say 'it's not fair because when he starts coming into our room, you'll be the first one he sees and I want him to come to me' so I said, that won't be for a while yet as he will have a baby gate on his room, and with the way toddlers can be he will probably walk around the bed to be with him if he wanted to, and I just said to not think that deep into it, for now it's just easier for me

He got angry and told me to shut up? But surely it makes sense for me to be next to the door given how many times I have to get up with the LB during the night, as he doesn't wake up to help 🤦‍♀️

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Alitlebitsleepy · 26/09/2022 21:18

He sounds incredibly selfish.

Rowen32 · 26/09/2022 21:59

That's awful, do not give in on this one, how selfish

Wolfiefan · 26/09/2022 22:02

He can have his preferred side of the bed. But you will be shoving him out of it each time his child wakes at night.
Or you get the side that makes it easier for you to get up.
He can choose.
Is he always such a selfish arsehole??

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Dacadactyl · 26/09/2022 22:05

Your boyfriend sounds about 12. I think he's too immature to parent from what you've said.

How bizarre.

catsnore · 26/09/2022 22:07

When you climb over him in the night be sure to kick him quite hard!

Azandme · 26/09/2022 22:07

Your LB will go to the person who has been there in the night since day 1, regardless of which side of the bed you're on.

Your OH is being a complete prat.

GiantTortoise · 26/09/2022 22:09

He is being ridiculous! He needs to get a grip.

sunflowerandivy · 26/09/2022 22:16

This can't be real. This is so unreasonable.

talknomore · 26/09/2022 22:16

let him have his way and disturb him every time you get up, easily done ;)

chocsaucestrawb · 27/09/2022 02:33

Seems like a very bizzare situation
How is the relationship other wise?

Why the heck is he not helping more?! My partner does night feeds and everything when he's here 50/50 that's not to gloat that's just how it should be imo x sorry op but he sounds like an absolute ass x

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