How soon is too soon to leave baby?

[purplegal]

My friends who have children told me I'd never get time to have my nails or hair done again or have anytime whilst at home to do anything. I have a three week old and he is a really easy baby thus far (not expecting this to last!) he doesn't cry much, sleeps lots and is happy entertaining himself on his play gym for ages at a time. I make sure I spend a good chunk of the day doing baby sensory, massage and having skin on skin time but I also get plenty of time to do chores etc. As he was a little earlier than planned and I didn't get any mat leave before he arrived, I would love to get my hair done (one of my unfulfilled pre baby tasks!) - would I be a bad mum for leaving him with my DH with expressed milk for 4 hours next week to get my hair done? I appreciate it's a first world dilemma and my hair really doesn't matter too much. I just wondered what other peoples opinions were on leaving a newborn for a short while. TIA!

Just do it - you will not be a bad mum. You shouldn't need Mumsnet to validate your thoughts.

It's too soon to leave a baby if it feels too soon to you. DH was taking DD1 out for 2 or 3 hours from week 1 to give me a rest. Everyone is fine.

That’s fine! He is with someone he knows and has food.

If you feel ready then do it!

Meant in the nicest possible way!

Do it now. In a few weeks the baby will wake up and be more demanding so you might as well enjoy it now or she’ll take a bottle

Assuming he takes a bottle ok, then I'd say whenever you're comfortable is fine.

I wish my 4 month old would take a bottle of expressed milk!

Absolutely not too soon! Keep hold of any thread of "you" that you can, as this easy stage may not last forever (though you're very lucky to have an easy baby at that age). Enjoy your mat leave - it's time for you to recover from birth and bond with your baby. Definitely take the chance to pamper yourself if you can. Congrats!

Do it
My sister had Dd2 overnight at 3 weeks.

Thanks everyone!! I feel ready and would like to keep being 'me' as well as 'mummy'. My thoughts are, the longer you leave it, the harder it will be to leave them! It just feels very different from how my friends told me it would be. I think I wanted to make sure I was being a good mum and doing enough with him. Can't wait to get my hair done! Thank you!! Xx

And yes DH is doing 1-2 feeds a day to allow me to rest so DS js used to expressed milk from a bottle 😊 x

Absolutely get out if you can and keep it up!
My boy never took a bottle and feed every couple of hours so I never got much time to myself.

It’s fine to go. Having said that, I took 7 week old ds to my hair appt last week and it was totally fine. Had it booked before his due date and then he arrived early…

Whatever your comfortable with, my MIL has had my daughter 9-5 every Friday since 3 weeks. I just sent her off with expressed milk. She has the best relationship with her grandparents and I've always appreciated the recharge day to myself, but I still always miss her when she's gone 😂 I don't think I'll get used to her being out without me till she starts nursery lol

Do it!
It will be good for everyone 😊

It's worth remembering in America where paid maternity leave doesn't exist many women go back to work and leave their baby in a nursery when the baby is 6 weeks old.

Personally i think it's too soon if you're breastfeeding. Great the baby takes expressed milk but won't you be bursting/filling up and need to pump if you're gone for 4+ hours? Just from a logistical point of view i think it's too soon

Not unreasonable, but make sure he takes a bottle first, because my daughter didn't! I had to leave her at five weeks to take an exam for my job and my partner had to painstakingly syringe milk into her.

His father is as much a parent as you - of course it’s fine.

And keep it up, you do not want to be on here in 7 years time saying you’ve never been away from your child for a night and you’re really worried about going away for the weekend..

Well the OP can take her pump and pump under the hairdressing gown can’t she? Ideal for the job.

Hell no! I remember with my little one was a few months old, I went and got my hair done, it was the first time I'd had a proper break

If you feel comfortable and youre happy that DH will be confident with baby then absolutely do it.
10 months later I still need to go and get my hair done as baby came early, damn pre-eclampsia, and I just havent made the time for myself!!!

It’s really not too soon if she is ok with it, most people can manage 4 hours without pumping, it’s not massively comfortable but it’s not disaster amount of time.

I went to the supermarket solo on the day after DS was born. I didn't even think twice about leaving him for an hour or so with his dad!

Everyone is different i suppose. I breastfed both of mine and couldn't have left for 4+ hours when they were three weeks old because they would have needed to be fed during that time at least once, probably twice and the thoughts of pumping under a hairdressing gown does not appeal! Maybe you could get a hairdresser to the house. Win win, you get your hair done and can just stop to feed the baby as needed.