9mo wakes so much I am exhausted

[Greecr]

My DS’ sleep went out the window when he was 4/5 months old. Prior to that it had been okay and quite good I’d say!

Now we’re at the worst it’s ever been. If I go to bed myself he seems to wake half an hour after like he can sense it?

im back at work now and really struggling. He does not sleep good and I don’t get what I can do ? I expected at this age he’d sleep a bit so I could get some rest but I can’t and I am
onnmy knees exhausted😭.

Any tips here I’m so exhausted that I cry

You poor thing. What kind of RL support do you have?

Are you still feeding at night? Can you give some idea of what you have tried in the past?

I would try white noise and a good consistent bedtime routine. When he wakes try patting and shushing.

Id also look at co-sleeping or getting a sleep coach to help you.

My other priority would be getting a couple of good nights sleep in a row for you. If you have a partner they should be doing their share especially as you are back at work. If not, do you have family who could help for a couple of nights so you can get a good sleep and then it will be easier to deal with. Leave the house if you need to for a night.

Sorry no advice but my 2 and a half year old has always been like this! It's as if he can sense that I'm about to drop off and he wakes up!

I feel your pain

Sorry forgot to give a bit of background!

so we do a bath, bottle and bed! And he originally goes into his cot but then ends up in our bed which doesn’t help his sleep but basically saves me going into the other room to settle him everytime he wakes lol

My boyfriend (baby’s dad) tries to settle him and I don’t know what it is when he does it our son will wake 5 minutes later?? Like he won’t fully go down after it I don’t know

I do have my mum nearby but as I’ve started work she has him 1 day a week so I feel guilty asking could she have him overnight. She’d say yes she adores spending time with him (and he always sleeps right through when he’s round there?? As he’s stayed about 4/5 times Which shows me he can do it!!)

He has a bottle on a off in the night. So when he’s cutting teeth he won’t eat as much solids in the day so has a 5-6oz bottle in the night! But if everything’s okay and he’s eating well he won’t have that

He just seems to wake to be settled or is in a light sleep most the night that’s the best way I can describe it?

He has 2x daytime naps and they’re usually 1.5 hour then 1 hour long. On some days shorter

I remember my DS being similar. Just try to remember it's not going to be like this forever.

Try introducing supper before bed. Porridge or hot weetabix with a banana mashed through.

Also, if it works for you and your mum is genuinely happy to have him then go for it one or two nights a week! Whatever gets you some sleep!

Sleep train , gently. :9 choose your method of comfort instead of feeding, so shushing , patting , rocking. Go in intervals 2,3,5,5,5 min do the same thing don't talk , be consistent, likelihood is baby will be much happier through the day once sleeping better too. X

Bumping for the morning crowd, OP.

I'm in exactly the same position.

So sorry you are in the thick of this at the moment, sleep deprivation is just horrid 🙁. My baby was also a rubbish sleeper, I don’t know what you are doing to get your little one back to sleep (I was usually boobing or jiggling him around). I did decide around 9 months I was fed up of it and decided to try the Ferber method as I did have a strong feeling it was his self settling that was the problem. We practiced firstly with him going off independently in his cot for naps and it soon translated into longer chunks of sleep at night (like within 2 days) occasionally 11 hours straight at night. Now I am having to redo a bit of this with him again as he recently had a cold and it put everything back to square one again but this is to be expected. I know people feel this method is harsh to babies but once they are over 6 months I think it’s felt to be appropriate developmentally and there is no evidence of it causing long term emotional issues etc. I also feel it was for the best for us and him as he is less miserable in the day with proper chunks of sleep

I’m starting to consider sleep training because in I’d say 3-4 months I haven’t had longer than 2 hours sleep at a time. On a good night i get a total of 5 hours but those nights are very rare

The only hurdle we’ve had this week is nursery! It’s been great but as he’s just started everything has been haywire and he barely napped
And he’s such an inquisitive baby that he wouldn’t nap even if exhausted if something fun was going on aka lots of babies playing

I sympathise OP, it's so tough having a bad sleeper. It sounds like things started with the 4 month sleep regression and never resolved? I agree that sleep training is the answer, he needs to be able to settle himself back down everytime he stirs during the night, it will be better for him and for you. You don't need to cut all night feeds right away if you think he's hungry but you could commit to not feeding until at least 5 hours after bedtime.

Yeah I would definitely sleep train. Gruelling but worth it

Put him in his cot and keep him there all night, and I would ditch overnight feeds as well. When we dropped ours at 8mo his sleep improved dramatically.

Good luck!

How do I get rid of the bottle he sometimes has in the night?

the other day he was awake for 3 hours until we gave him it (and he cried in this time wasnt just sat chatting )

Just do sleep training... It will work and you will all get more muuuuch more sleep and feel human again. It's not only you who needs more sleep, your child likely really does too. Babies learn to sleep very quickly when given the space to do so.

I used Precious Little Sleep ebook with DD at 5 or 6 months and within 3 days she was going from waking every 1-2 hours all night to just one feed at 2am. In 3 DAYS of sleep training. It was amazing, we got our evenings back, we got sleep at night. My daughter is still a great sleeper at 3.

I know so many people will make you feel guilty about it but there is so much evidence that it doesn't cause any issues (and evidence that not enough sleep does cause issues -- for everyone!). In the morning, your baby will be smiling up at you, having had a great sleep and you will know that you made a good decision.

^ This!

@Endlesslaundry123 Precious Little Sleep is amazing, I have would have figured out wake windows for my baby without their Facebook group!

The huckleberry app is good to use to educate about wake windows / acts as a guide as to when they need to sleep.

agree with PP re some sleep training too - better for all concerned

Yes, 9 months is a good age when they can learn to self-settle if you apply a consistent method that works for you too. Good luck!

Sorry if I've missed this but I'm not clear on what you/DP are doing to settle DS back to sleep when he wakes, you mention you're not sure what DP does and recently waited 3hrs before giving DS a bottle (he was crying, so possibly hungry).

My baby has to either be fed or rocked back to sleep.