How do you make your toddler strap into their car seat?

[ElfinsMum]

My youngest just hates being strapped into the car seat.

I have older kids so she has to do a lot of short trips for extra curriculars etc. My toddler parenting go tos (cave in over small things, offer choices wherever you can, laugh at or ignore what you don't want to see) aren't possible over the car seat since it is an absolute non negotiable. I have sunk to bribery but the power of the bribe keeps wearing off and I'm running out of things I'd actually be prepared to offer.

Anyone got the answer for me please? The huge amount of time to get anywhere and the screaming on every trip is really bringing us all down.

Sounds really tough, we are lucky that our toddler is happy to strap in, in fact he always wants to strap himself.
Having said that, I wonder if there's more choice possible there. Have you tried letting them choose a mobile or toy to have only in the car? Or even if you are travelling with another adult you can let your toddler strap you into the car, or even just role play car trips even if you don't actually go somewhere.
Also there could be something physically uncomfortable with the car seat, maybe you could let them choose one stop on the way, if they say "sausage sandwiches" then you will stop as soon as it's safe and get out for a 5 minute break. One per trip maximum. That might be less stress than the battle at the start of the journey and puts the child in control so they may not need to use it much once they have it.
Good luck!!

If they're rear facing turn them round

They can be little terrors can't they!? Is she able to unstrap herself?

On occasion I literally have to fold my child into the car seat/pushchair/bike seat, but he can't unstrap himself atm. It just has to be a non-negotiable thing he has to do otherwise he wouldn't be able to go to any of the places he loves. Although luckily once he is in and strapped down he usually just excepts it and is fine. Sometimes I just have to live with some annoyed whining. What happens if you do that?

Letting mine climb into the car seat themselves is working at the moment as well as asking questions to distract them whilst going in. Good luck!

Oh yes I have one of these, he’s not even 2 so can’t even try to reason with him! To get them in- fold, and pin down. To get them to stay without wiggling arms free- remove the strap padding and make sure it’s super tight. To keep them happy- forward facing, drink, snack, dummy and on longer journeys the ipad. I’ve also seen Cybex seats with an impact shield rather than straps that look
great but it seems wasteful to replace a perfectly good seat that’s not even a year old.

@LGBirmingham She isn't going to places that she loves though. She's doing several boring little trips per day to e.g. supermarket, swimming pool, school, football etc etc She's the youngest of my three.

Oh and she's forward facing. Has been for ages. But we just got a new car and discovered too late that her view out is a lot more restricted which won't be helping.

Rear facing exists for a reason…..

OP, one of mine was a nightmare. The only thing that worked for me was being truthful. If you’re not strapped in and we have a crash, you’ll end up seriously hurt or dead.

I know it’s a pain but to break this pattern with mine I stopped the car every single time (if safe to do so). Then I got out, walked round and strapped them in again with a stern face and word.

Rinse and repeat. They eventually get that it is non negotiable. I have done the same with my grand daughter.

We used to strap our DC in quickly and then shove a snack or a toy in their face just as they started kicking off. We had to put a second clip on the harness since DC worked out how to undo the first one and got out of the car seat and starting moving about the car on the motorway.

Is it about the car seat or the being dragged around everywhere. My youngest used to moan like fuck about doing the school runs etc with my eldest. But seeing it from their point of view, I could understand how rubbish it was to leave playing to go on the school run.

Is there anyway you can leave the toddler at home/with someone else while doing all of the boring crap? Can the older ones make their own way/with a friend?

Stick peppa pig whatever on its a game changer

Try her rear facing? They can often see more out of the back if you remove their seat headrest and the novelty can be exciting. A lot of the spinning seats go rear facing and they are nice and easy to get them in, too. (Appreciate changing the seat might not be an option!)

I second checking the seat is correctly adjusted with the right inserts in case it's a comfort issue. If the seat is older see if the padding is still intact and it's not been squashed by other kids.

We also have toys that are just for the car, so they are a novelty. Snacks can also be a distraction - something quickly eaten and/or unlikely to be a choking hazard.

Other than that, loose straps, fold them in bum first, do up buckle, arms back in if they have got them out and then tighten fast before they can escape! If you hold the toy/snack up so that they look up, it gets them to rest their shoulders back so those are in the right place - it won't tighten properly if they are leaning forwards out of the seat, it kind of hunches them over.

For the actual trip, a nursery rhyme CD? It's torture but better than screaming.

Do something that's proven to be less safe?!!! Seriously!!!!

May not be ideal but would probably work, tablet just for the car? Can put it on the front headrest in a harness.

Climbing in himself worked for my ds at 3ish.

Tickling him when he's standing rigid and won't sit down

Having the straps really loose so you can clip dc in quickly and tighten after is better for us than trying to navigate the whole getting arms in business.

I spy in the car - or agree a list of 3 things to spot in advance of getting in

Let dc decide the route if there are sensible alternatives (past the car wash or past the lorry park? Past the cows or past the sheep today?)

Let them try to direct you, telling you left or right or the xth exit at the roundabout.

Sing songs together from a not too annoying cd (my boss is usually behind me when we try this)

Car sickness was bad for ours when rear facing. I know people who hate facing backwards on a train for this reason

A new seat did the trick when we had this issue. We tried a whole lot of other things but it turned out she just wasn't comfy even though the seat was still the right size. Appreciate that a new seat might not be feasible though. Could you look at whether you can change where she is in the car so she can see better?

Fidget toys in the car - hold it so when they reach for it you can get the strap over their arm