Easier with one….

[Esteemed]

Does anyone else with one DC find that nobody takes them seriously if they mention they find parenting difficult (even if only briefly) I have one DS and find that people think I have it easy because “there’s only one to deal with”…. Because the 2 year old that I have who doesn’t sleep and is a fussy eater is all fun and games 🙄

Sorry you’re having a rough time.

I don’t know if my experience chimes with yours. The two families I know where the parents seem to and certainly say they find parenting very hard both have one and they both seem so stressed I can’t imagine anyone saying that to them. People inevitably think their lot is the hardest and a challenging toddler plus a baby is probably harder than one challenging toddler. But a supportive friend will let you rant a bit without shutting you down by playing misery top trumps. It may be that they can relate to the toddler stress but also know they find it harder with two or more.

Is that sort of what you mean or have I misunderstood?

It’s not wrong per se because if in addition to your challenging toddler, you also had a 5 year old who needs to do homework and a newborn that needs a feed, then of course it would be harder. But that’s not really the point. It shouldn’t be a competition, everyone finds it hard at times and good friends should let each vent without judgement.

It's annoying but it's true

@FlounderingFruitcake is right it isn’t a competition. Trying to deal with competitive needs of children is one of the hardest things of parenting. And now I have two who don’t sleep and are suddenly fussy eaters.

I read on MN once that the easiest number of children is one less than you have. Parenting is hard.