Is the social worker right?!

[Snoop85]

I’m currently in a situation where I’m not sure if my social worker is out of line.
Ive recently received a social worker report back.
my children are happy and safe.
Im worried that she recounts every incident of violence between me and my ex partner.
it is in no way relevant to the case.
is she breaking any law?

Any sort of domestic violence affects children. That’s why your social worker is talking it so seriously.

My ex husband is now able to see this as a copy was also sent to him.

Surely with so many past cases where SWs have attended cases where no concern was registered about the child that subsequently died, SWs feel they need to protect themselves by showing the case has been investigated thoroughly.

Are you worried that the report is going to be seen by people not involved in the case?

Sorry cross posted.

I think that he should see it. If your child was living with your ex and there was violence happening, wouldn't you want to know?

Retired SW here. Yes she is right to detail this. As I assume your ex-h is the father of your DC then he has right to know what risks your ex-p pose to his children. I can't imagine what sort of law you think she might have broken? She is merely setting out the facts.

If there is domestic violence in the home then your children are being emotionally abused. They are not happy and safe. You need to wake up and put your children needs before your own by ending the relationship or you will very likely lose your children.

The fact there is a SW involved should be enough. Have you ended the violent relationship?

Isn't this exactly what you'd want a social worker to do?

I'm sorry you're going through a rough time. This really is the best thing in the long run, assuming youve split with the abuser

She is not breaking the law and this is part of her job. If the law you are thinking of relates to your right to confidentiality, this is overridden by the issue of child safeguarding.

Your dc are being emotionally damaged growing up in an unsafe home.

I can see that this is going to cause difficulties for you.

But I'm afraid your social worker is 100% correct. She's produced a report that includes all important factors in the childrens lives.

Hypothetically, she would also include that the childrens mother was caring for a terminally ill relative while they were at school, or had been made redundant or any other situation that may not directly affect the happiness and safety of the children but was a situation being experienced in the household.

I'm sorry you've experienced domestic violence. I hope that the long term outcome of the social workers involvement is positive for you all.

Is your ex partner the children's father? And is the social worker involved because of the children/ safeguarding them?

If so, of course it is relevant.

Your right to confidentiality is overridden by safeguarding, I'm afraid.

My friend adopted a child that was removed from his mother because both her, her partner and her mother were extremely violent to each other and outsiders although never the child. The child was however surrounded by this chaotic lifestyle.

Under the DV act 2021, children have finally been recognised as victims of DV in their own right.
The impact that domestic abuse in the home has on the children can be huge and long lasting.
You may not like it, but yes the sw was right.

I hope you are receiving all the support you need in terms of the abuse and recovering from it as a family.

Is it from your ex husband? or a previous ex partner prior to you husband? or after your husband?

Social workers are only involved in houses where they need to be-sounds like she is just doing her job-don’t blame her! If my children were living in a house where DV was going on-I would want to know.

This is of course correct?
Are you really so naive to think that violence between you and your partner won't affect the children?
It absolutely will

Are you worried that your ex husband now knows things that you told the social worker in confidence?

I think it is a bit unclear as there's not enough information in your post.

If the social worker has informed your ex husband and that potentially puts you at risk, that is a little more complicated and could be a problem. You should speak to the social worker about it if you are worried about how he will react to this.

This is entirely appropriate. Your children are victims of domestic violence and you are not taking that seriously, so it is reasonable to question if you are adequately safeguarding. Their father has a right to know. If he can provide a home without violence, it would be a better home for them. You need to ensure there is no violence in your home, or you could lose your children.

Your children might be safe now but they will have been affected by exposure to your dv situation. It is also potentially a risk factor for future relationships.

she recounts every incident of violence between me and my ex partner.it is in no way relevant to the case

Then why does she even know about it?