Tears at School Run

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My eldest, in year 6, was pushed/dragged around by some classmates and then one student, put his hands around his neck and was choking him. It was a sort of freak thing that happened and the choker child moved away. Since then my son who had previously had no problem going into school has really struggled. We are working really hard to support him going in, but some mornings he is getting upset and crying.
I wonder if anyone has any tips for supporting him, and/or for how I can shake off the crappy feeling of leaving him crying? I realised on the way home today I've now had 9 years of at least one child crying 75% of school term days. I feel like I'm reaching my limit of absorbing all the stress and sadness!

Bloody hell. Your poor son. No advice but what is the school doing? How have they reacted and making sure it never happens again?

Oh goodness that's so upsetting. It sounds like it's really traumatised him, is there a school counsellor he can see or could you take him to the dr it sounds like ptsd.

Thanks, they spoke to the students, and some were red carded but that was it. As far as they are concerned its separation anxiety and they don’t see the link between the two things. The fact he is perfectly fine in all other scenarios they don’t see, and he stops crying and is then “okay” the rest of the day. Have a meeting after school Thursday.

Wow, that's awful. He probably no longer feels safe at school/drop off time. I think the school need to accept responsibility for allowing this to happen and to really work on making your DS feel like he is not going to be attacked. Don't let them minimise it as that is just likely to reinforce that school don't care.

"I realised on the way home today I've now had 9 years of at least one child crying 75% of school term days."

Sounds so hard. Would homeschooling be an option?

In your meeting with school, discuss what they can offer in terms of supported arrival at school.

Could you drop him at reception or in the classroom, if it is the playground before school that is the issue? Can he go straight to his class teacher or another supportive adult

Dies the school have - or could they create - a Y6 office / class assistant role, where he cones to school early and does errands until the start of the school day?

Can he have a ‘buddy’ - a trusted friend, or i deed a younger child he is responsible for - who meets him on arrival each day and eases that transition? If you walk the same way as others, meeting a friend well away from the school site and walking together may help.

Thankfully it hasn't been the same child crying! They seem to take it in turns, or else I think I'd have given up ages ago and done home schooling.

@JonSnowedUnder that's exactly it, hoping to get somewhere with the teacher. It was obvious his last teacher just told her he was fine once he stopped crying as that's what she told me...but to me, that's not the entire picture. A child who didn't have trouble coming in, now does, because of something that happened on their watch, and as far as I'm concerned just because he doesn't give them trouble about it, that doesn't mean he isn't struggling and they ought to support him properly. And not by making him feel worse by saying he's in year 6, or that next year he won't have me to help him in secondary etc.,

@cantkeepawayforever That is a good idea, I will ask, I'm torn between how I think they ought to support him as I don't want his worry/anxiety to be accomodated as it were, but help to push through it. He doesn't ever seem inclined to join his friends on the plaground before we go in, and is adamant he doens't want to line up. The morning "lining up" on the playground is chaos and the support from his TA hit or miss which makes it stressful even for me as I can't rely on someone being there to just help him through the door so sometimes his anxiety is amped up by the fact were are stood outside where we are supposed to be, waiting for someone who doesn't show...

Wrong thread! Sorry