DS3 who is 5 has just started primary 1. He was struggling a bit at nursery, lashing out and not able to communicate fully. We got a plan in place and things settled down. Now in week 3 of school, second full day, the teacher has come to me in the middle of the playground at home time to tell me he has basically been out of control since he started school. Hitting and kicking and biting.
None of these behaviours are exhibited at home. He does struggle with his emotions and we know certain triggers set him off and we do our best to mitigate them but I am heart broken.
He was sobbing and distraught. He told me today he had to go to the head teachers office and was told he was a bad boy.
I have long had a suspicion that there is more going on than just being naughty. You can see him get the impulse to do something and he does it before thinking. As soon as he has done it you can see the remorse.
He hates loud noises. Hates change. Wants routine and doesn't cope well with sudden changes in plan. Doesn't like people invading his space unless invited. Avoids eye contact especially when he knows he has done wrong.
I don't know what the point of this thread is really. I have spoke to the school nurse who covers all schools in our area and she seems confused and frustrated. She doesn't understand why if he has been disruptive for almost 3 weeks it took till yesterday to let me know. She is of the opinion that his behaviour can't be that much of a concern if they waited this long to speak to me. She also thinks the way I was told, in front of DS and all his classmates and parents/carers was wrong. Yes he needs to know the school will tell me when he has misbehaved but they also need to tell me positive things as well.
I just have this gut feeling that this is going to be an uphill battle and it breaks my heart to know that my little boy is so misunderstood and labelled as that child in the class when that's not who he is at all.