Single Parenting

[bucksmama]

Hi, I've been a single parent for nearly a year now. My daughter is 3 and I broke up as I had issues with my ex's children who lived with us (11,15,17) not accepting our daughter and myself so it caused major issues in the relationship.

We live separately and he is providing financially, he has a big house, garden and all the fun things. After 3 months of not seeing her, he now sees her once a week. forgets to call, and sometimes forgets to see her, so this has made her increasingly obsess over when she is next seeing him.

Lately when my daughter returns she has the biggest tantrums, full of anger towards me and says she wants to live with her Dad and boys and wants me to go away. I know she doesn't really know what she wants, that it's all confusing for her, but I find this heartbreaking and unfair as I am the one doing everything with her, sleepless nights and all..... I kind of feel like she will grow up with hate towards me for leaving.. has anyone else experienced this?

Is this common? does it get better as they get older? any suggestions?

Is there some way the time/care can be split more evenly or do you not want that? I think kids quickly realise all is not so fun and sparkly rainbows at the other parent’s house when ‘normal’ life has to be lived. Plus it would give you more time to re-energise, too.

I split my childhood between parents and I think the main reason I never felt resentment at either of them was because the childcare was split and so I had both being responsible/making me eat my veg/do my homework/help in the house etc. If one has been all fun and games and the other not it might have been different.

Must be so hurtful for you. I hope others chime in with brilliant advice!