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If your DD was awful at age 4

8 replies

Jets121 · 25/08/2022 19:45

What age are they now and what are they like?

DD is 4 & awful. No respect for me, hits, bites, scratches, runs away, totally wild. We have at least a couple of episodes like this each day. She can be lovely & sweet the rest of the time.

Yes I do try & discipline her before someone comes along & tells me to try that. No the naughty step doesn’t work, she laughs in my face & runs off.

She comes from a loving, consistent, stable background. We try to have fun but we do have standards eg things like TV & sweets are limited, she is expected to say please & thank you and eat nicely at the table etc. That kind of thing. We’re not a feral family.

She’s been at a very good private pre-school & they raised no issues & she got an excellent report, noting she’s above average in many respects.

She starts reception in September.

Does this sound like normal / a phase?!
Or should I have deeper concerns?!

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dribblewibble · 25/08/2022 19:48

20- something. She's still a princess and demanding and her way or the highway but she's not my problem any more. 🤣🤣🤣. Her partner has the patience of a saint. The teen years were fun. Not.

She has no SN that I'm aware of.

MsChatterbox · 25/08/2022 19:50

Mine is still 4 but I'm putting a lot of it down to being out of routine and anticipating starting school soon. Could it be that way for you?

Jets121 · 25/08/2022 21:05

@MsChatterbox i hope so. I’m fed up of ending the days close to / in tears

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MolliciousIntent · 25/08/2022 21:26

If the naughty step doesn't work, what do you do instead? Are you just caving?

Honestly, this sounds more like a lack of boundaries than typical 4yr old behaviour, and so is likely to escalate rather than be grown out of.

Nowifi · 25/08/2022 21:50

Mine was awful and regularly had me in tears. Didn't respond to any discipline and would have just run away from the naughty step.

It didn't escalate as PP have posted and now she is 6 she can regulate her own emotions a lot more. She's still high maintenance and a drama queen but that's just her personality!

OfficiallyBroken · 25/08/2022 22:21

My eldest was awful with me specifically at that age...maybe a little younger. My mother couldn't get over the difference between time she had with my daughter vs seeing my daughter and I together.

In our case fortunately it passed. By the time her baby sister arrived when she was 5 she was largely a lovely girl with only occasional "super powered brat" moments.

Now she's a lovely teenager, if slightly stereotypical as a bit of a teenage grump when she's tired.

Hang in there, I'm sure this bit won't last forever and if you need support make sure you ask for it.

Jets121 · 25/08/2022 22:25

If the naughty step doesn't work, what do you do instead? Are you just caving?
Honestly, this sounds more like a lack of boundaries than typical 4yr old behaviour, and so is likely to escalate rather than be grown out of

@MolliciousIntent

  • confiscation of favourite toy (for short period until good behaviour resumes)
  • sent to bed early
  • loses privileges eg TV or bedtime stories
  • if bad behaviour out & about we leave and come home.
dont let her get away with it. Feel free to advise how you would handle situation
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Jets121 · 25/08/2022 22:29

Hang in there, I'm sure this bit won't last forever and if you need support make sure you ask for it

@OfficiallyBroken who do I ask for support though?

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