Hi everyone. Need a rant and some advice! DD is 8 and going into yr4 in September.
DD made friends with a girl (I'll call her Alice) on the first day of reception class and I was so pleased she'd made a friend so quickly. Alice seemed like a nice little girl at first and I got on well with her mum. From around the 2nd term of reception Alice started to show her more assertive side that has never subsided, only grown more into what I'd call defiance as she's got older!
DD isn't the most confident child in the class I would have put her a happy middle at this point, not shy but not first to put her hand up either.
Over the years Alice has become more and more domineering over DD plus other girls in the class and there is always some kind of drama and falling out EVERY DAY which Alice is always involved in. She likes to rule the roost it seems and throws almighty tantrums both at home and the way to school, clinging onto her mum who has been having to walk her to the classroom door every day. The small group of girls who play together have to dance to her tune and god forbid they stand up for themselves and say no to her, all hell breaks lose. I never used to say anything to her mum as I thought it was just playground stuff but as
DD's confidence has totally dwindled over the years and her class work has suffered a bit because of it, I've now taken to telling her mum when Alice has said or done something particularly mean. She always says she'll talk to Alice, we get a feeble apology then a day later she's back to her tricks.
The girls haven't seen each other for 5 weeks until today when they were both at a summer holiday club. DD has come out and moaned ever since how Alice was leaving her out of games, making her look silly and generally being mean.
I've always thought to myself in the back of my mind is Alice bullying DD, then think no that's silly they're too young to actually bully. I don't know how to put my finger on it. DD has seen the school nurse and CAHMS for her anxiousness which has built up over the years and ended up having huge panic attacks. I'm not sure if that was related to school or other factors at the time though.
It seems to me that something is having a profound effect on DD where Alice is concerned. She's been happy all holidays at the kids club, the one day Alice turns up there's drama. I don't know if DD is over sensitive or if I need another word with Alice mum or if I need to give my own head a wobble.
(Alice's parents are a couple of wet sponges who don't discipline their children because they can't deal with the meltdowns 🙈🙈)
Fully aware I sound like a child here too but needed to get that off my chest!