Hi everyone, I’ve come on here to ask for a bit of advice. My boyfriend, who I will refer to as B, has been smoking weed since he was 12 and he is now 22, since getting together B always told me he’d quit and that’s why I stayed with him.
In October 2021 I found out that I was pregnant with our baby boy, I told him straight away that he needed to be off the drugs before our baby was born to which he reluctantly agreed.
Over the next few months B said that he had made progress but as he lives at home I did not believe him.
My son is now 5 weeks old, B has not come off the weed and it’s really affecting our relationship. My family have never been involved in drugs and I do not want to bring my baby up around them.
Yesterday, we went to a support service, in a nutshell, the mentor said that she doesn’t think he is really willing to come off the weed. I have to agree with her, he’s admitted to still being on 8/9 joints a day and smoking ‘doubles’ when he gets stressed.
He spends over £100 a week on weed and then tells me that he doesn’t have £10 to top up his phone so I can contact him whilst he’s at work.
Does anyone really think there’s any chance of him coming off the weed when he doesn’t seem to want to do it. He’s already had almost a year, what is a realistic time frame? The mentor said some people wake up one day and decide to never take it again and work hard to not relapse. B has said that he wants 2 or 3 years to come off it, but with the lack of progress and motivation so far I think he’s talking nonsense.
He’s grown up around drugs and all his family take them casually on a daily basis. I didn’t know that it was wired into his lifestyle like this and he told me when we first met that he took it socially now and again, obviously this was a lie.
He stays over at me and my families house at the weekend and just smokes a vape, he says this is progress but then says he’s “gagging” for weed by the time he gets home and smokes a really strong amount after not having it for the weekend. Surely this is counter productive and just feeding into his addiction.
I’ve told him that he’s got to pick between the drugs or his family, he’s had enough time to get off it or even make an ounce of progress.
He wouldn’t be coming off it if it wasn’t for me pressuring him so is it even possible?