Worried my 7mo isn't reaching milestones.

[heyyouboo]

As the title says really. He doesn't respond to his name (he has never, not even once), he won't make eye contact unless you get up in his face and force him to (but when he does lock eyes with you, he's really happy) - though he loves staring and making eye contact with strangers. He rolls over (started at I think 4/5 months), but couldn't roll back to belly and belly to back until around 2 weeks ago which I gather is a little late. He shakes his head a lot. He's also constantly quite miserable bless him.
HV doesn't seem concerned but I'm wondering if there's something going on. A very VERY unprofessional GP all but diagnosed him with autism - which I complained about given he was only 6mo at the time and he's not even qualified to do so. But it did get me thinking and worrying, really. Another GP says it's too early to think about things like this, have to wait and see. I understand that and he's probably right.
Just looking for some reassurance or answers.
Does it sound like autism, learning difficulties, something like that?
He wasn't premature. I did have a horrible birth though, I wonder if that could've done something. Or maybe it's in my head a bit and he's just a bit late to things! I feel like it's all my fault because I had PND and didn't do enough with him for the first few months. I've really tried to make things right and help aid in his development but I don't know what to do.

Yeah my DD didn't bother herself rolling till 9 months or something! She's a perfectly fine and active 3yo now. He's still so young for a lot of that stuff to be consistent. Have you looked at the ages and stages questionnaires for his age?

The only thing that concerns me is the shaking of his head. Could he have fluid on his ears? Might be why he he doesn't respond because the fluid can muffle sounds. Might be worth having someone look in his ears.

The above comment isn’t helpful nor is it true. Often said by people with no experience of babies.

That said, they do all do things at totally different rates, at random, and don’t shears remember how to do the thing they did yesterday.

I don’t actually read the milestone things very often, it’s not something I particularly want to get preoccupied with. OP you sound like you could be projecting a lot of the guilt you feel about PND onto what the baby is/isn’t doing- do you think that could be right?

Milestones are a very blunt instrument! They are just a vague guide and within those there are huge individual variations. For a GP to even mention autism in relation to such a tiny person is irresponsible in the extreme.

Please do not let this get you in a stew - the chances of there being anything at all to worry about are very small indeed. I hope you can just concentrate on enjoying him.

You are right for sure. I feel extremely guilty. My PND was horrendous, for months I didn't even want to hold him or look at him. It's crazy because now I feel completely different, I absolutely adore him.
Maybe I should take these milestones as very rough guidelines instead of absolutes. 🤔

Thank you, makes me feel much better. I managed to file a complaint against the GP, it's pretty awful that he even had the gall to make a specialist diagnosis on a six-month-old baby. I dread to think how many parents he's worried half to death 😥

Actually, he does currently have an ear infection but he's been shaking his head for months (ofc the infection is making it a lot worse). But very good point 🙂

At that age he might just be shaking his head because he enjoys the sensory experience. My ds did the same thing but he grew out of it - I was worried it was stimming. My ds also used to wildly look around the room and it was hard to get eye contact unless I got his attention and went close to him. He actually became really good with communication from 12 months onward.

Your 7 mo just sounds like a typical baby to me!

And fluid in their ears can make them more prone to infection. It usually clears by itself but my baby was born with it and we were told it could delay him. I'm not saying it to alarm you. Just to make you aware and it's something that is easily checked. 😊

@romdowa that's interesting, never heard of that. How would I go about getting it checked? He is having recurring ear infections too. Hope your little one is doing well now 😊

@drkpl thank you so much for your comment, it's really reassuring. My son also looks wildly around the room as you put it lol. He's very engaged with his surroundings but not with people.