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Original poster

Favouritism ?

14 replies

wasthataburp · 14/08/2022 13:35

Just wondering what people thoughts are on this. I have two DCs my sister had one dc couple years older than mine so first GC to our parents.

Sisters Child sleeps over very regularly with my parents, goes on holiday abroad for 10 days at a time with my parents without his parents.

So basically my sister has an on tap over night babysitter whenever she likes.

My kids have had about 3 sleepovers in their entire lives at my parents house. They just won't take them. Would never get invited away with them etc either (not that I think I'd be comfortable with that but invites would be nice).

What do you think about this and do you think I'm right to be a little hurt by it.

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Creepymanonagoatfarm · 14/08/2022 13:45

Well The Golden One can wipes their arses in old age.
And I don't mean dc's...
My ils never bothered with my dc when sil had hers..
And as an only dc my dm was never that involved either..
It is rubbish op. Back away gracefully and enjoy having your dc to yourself.

wast542 · 14/08/2022 19:42

@Creepymanonagoatfarm yeah I know you are right! It's blatantly obvious when I say it out loud.

BreadInCaptivity · 14/08/2022 20:02

Frankly it makes me very happy (not that I'm unhappy anyway) about being an only child.

In my social circle I don't know one person who doesn't have (or is) the "golden sibling".

Does not seem to have any bearing on the "quality" of the sibling either. Frankly I've never been able to fathom it - one friend has a brother whom his mother would describe as having the looks of Brad Pitt, combined with the wit of Stephen Fry and brains of Stephen Hawing.

He's known locally a creepy Chris and is an utter misogynistic sleezeball and hasn't married because "nobody is good enough" as his mum would say, but because women in a 20 mile radius wouldn't touch the prick (with average looks, less than average intellect and is a wit/charisma free zone) with a shitty stick. His brother on the other hand is a great person all round.

You can spend life stressing about it, or rejoice in the fact (as a pp put it) you'll be reciprocating in kind ie not at all in the future.

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G5000 · 14/08/2022 20:08

I know what you mean - my niece was practically raised by my parents, always taken on holidays with them, never mind regular sleepovers. My DC have had just a handful of sleepovers and never any holidays as parents say they are older and not able to manage any more.

But sister is pregnant with DC2. I don't want to sound cynical but I wouldn't be too surprised if parents suddenly discovered they are young and fit again..

wast542 · 14/08/2022 20:09

@BreadInCaptivity yeah that's it. It doesn't seem to have any reasoning behind it at all. I have never in my life before kids felt like my sibling was the favourite ever. It just seems that there is a blatant favourite grandchild so I think that stings more as I don't want my kids noticing - although in a few years when they are older, how could they not!

wast542 · 14/08/2022 20:18

G5000 · 14/08/2022 20:08

I know what you mean - my niece was practically raised by my parents, always taken on holidays with them, never mind regular sleepovers. My DC have had just a handful of sleepovers and never any holidays as parents say they are older and not able to manage any more.

But sister is pregnant with DC2. I don't want to sound cynical but I wouldn't be too surprised if parents suddenly discovered they are young and fit again..

This is literally my life!

G5000 · 14/08/2022 21:01

wast542 also with a younger but still favoured niece/nephew?

wast542 · 14/08/2022 21:02

G5000 · 14/08/2022 21:01

wast542 also with a younger but still favoured niece/nephew?

Sorry no they only have the one. Just realised it sounded like they have 2!

wast542 · 15/08/2022 11:43

Yep definitely over it now. DN has been staying there all weekend and I've asked (naively) if they can have them for 1 night next weekend so I can take my husband out for dinner for his birthday but obviously it's been a no from them. Not sure why I expected anything else really.

G5000 · 15/08/2022 11:56

Sorry to hear. What's their reasoning? For my parents it's their age, there is indeed 10 years between DN and my DC1 and yes I am also more tired now than I was 10 years ago. But still, mum is still very fit and active and always telling me how easy and well behaved my DC are compared to DN.
Of course nobody will acknowledge that it's because dear sister is and has always been the Golden Child..

wast542 · 15/08/2022 12:04

G5000 · 15/08/2022 11:56

Sorry to hear. What's their reasoning? For my parents it's their age, there is indeed 10 years between DN and my DC1 and yes I am also more tired now than I was 10 years ago. But still, mum is still very fit and active and always telling me how easy and well behaved my DC are compared to DN.
Of course nobody will acknowledge that it's because dear sister is and has always been the Golden Child..

Not much of a reason really just that they won't manage. It's not like we would leave them all weekend there or anything we would be picking them up early ish in the morning.

Just a couple years between our kids and DN - not ten years or anything like that.

I need to get a grip and stop feeling sorry for myself but it's hard to not have a touch of resentment when I see my sister and her hubby having all these amazing date nights and dinners with friends and general down time.

wast542 · 15/08/2022 12:07

They also never tell us when they have had DN like they don't want us to know. Even If phoned for a chat etc they won't mention he's there when I ask what they are up to that day etc. I always know though as my sister will plaster her every move on social media.

Imthedamnfoolwhoshothim · 15/08/2022 12:08

How many do you have?

wast542 · 15/08/2022 12:10

Imthedamnfoolwhoshothim · 15/08/2022 12:08

How many do you have?

2 kids

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