Really struggling today, this might be a long ramble but need to get it off my chest.
I'm a working mum who's split from their dad.. so in the holidays I have no choice but to rely on family/their dad/holiday clubs while I work, aswell as their usual fri-mon with their dad every other weekend. I obviously have still had them, on my days off and in the evenings if they don't stay over at their Nana's (if she's got them Monday and Tuesday for example, it makes sense for them to sleep there the Monday night). I miss them terribly and it's frustrating when they come home irritable or moany, answer back etc because I feel like the only time I'm getting with them, I'm on their case. I've just had an emotional outburst (not Infront of them) because my daughter who's 8 has told me she feels like she's barely seen me, they're always at other people's houses etc...coupled with a comment my son who's 5 made lately about how we don't go and do fun things when they're with me. We literally went on holiday two weeks ago so I know it's not true, but it hurts all the same. It doesn't help that we recently got a dog, so I'm asking them to play in their room more often because she will chew their toys, or asking them to be quieter so she can sleep or whatever. I guess they're just feeling the change, I had the whole of last summer off with them. How do you stop feeling so guilty? I feel like I'm failing at being a good mum, my house is upside down, my boyfriend probably thinks I'm crazy, I've fallen out of love with my job...just feel really meh and needed to write it out! Thanks if you even got to the end of this x