14mo not walking or talking

[Snickers94]

Hi all, just wanted to know if anyone had been through similar. My DD is nearly 14 months and cannot walk or say words just yet. Yesterday she did sing along "quack quack quack" with 5 little ducks but that's about it. But more worryingly she's been walking holding hands since 7mo but at nearly 14 months is still cruising and can't walk independently. If we try to get her to walk now sometimes she will just pull her legs up or fall into a crawling position so as not to walk.

It's getting me down a bit seeing all her age mates starting to say their first words, and take their first steps before her when everyone thought she would walk early. It doesn't seem like she actually wants to walk.

As for other milestones, her social ones she did all at a normal time, gross motor was also fine although on the later end of normal, except walking with hands held and standing with support which she was able to do early. However she still doesn't stand by herself.

Obvious question, but Have you spoken to your health visitor?

So at her 12 month check she was fine, not behind on anything, and they're never worried about her because she's still doing everything on time and isn't delayed.

Do you think she can't stand by herself i.e. she has a problem bearing weight or with balance? Or she doesn't want to yet?

It's almost certainly the latter in which case she'll do it in her own time. If you notice a physical problem that means she can't do it go and see your HV or GP.

Many babies are not doing much more than babbling so I wouldn't worry about that either.

She's been able to bear weight since she was very tiny, about 2-3 months, hence why we all thought she would walk early. She's very sturdy and can bear weight and walk really well with support, but just not independently. But I'm not sure why not since she has been walking supported for nearly 7 months now. The development has been super slow

Is a 14 month old really meant to be able to walk and talk..? My 13 month 3 week old can't do either! Not even looking close. I'm not worried!

Walking and talking are not 12 month milestones even though we seem to think they are for some reason. It's actually 18 months that both are expected. Don't worry, she sounds totally fine! All my kids crawled and cruised by about 9 months and everyone said they would be walking early, but no, not really. 16 months/15 months.

Some children do get to things earlier than others but it doesn't mean anything in the grand scheme of things. She'll get there 🙂

That's probably why then, if she can get around well at the moment she doesn't really have incentive to walk. DS1 only walked when he realised that he couldn't carry things and crawl at the same time. DS2 was a bit more unsteady at cruising but did go for it as soon as he could basically. DS3 carries things in his mouth like a dog so probably won't walk any time soon (he's nearly 12mo).

I feel under a lot of pressure as people keep asking me if she's walking yet and babies younger than her are taking their first steps. It just feels less special when she reaches that milestone because it's like "oh finally!" For instance with crawling, she started commando crawling at 10 months and would then do a leg shuffle, before finally crawling 'normally' between 11-12 months. But when she did start crawling in the typical sense no one batted an eyelid, and when she commando crawled it was regarded as odd. I know it's not about what other people think, but I just hate the comments.

My DS (now 12) didn’t walk until nearly 19 months. He crawled faster. Your little be probably knows there are helpful people and things around to hold onto. Mine didn’t say much either until much later. Worried myself sick. Absolutely fine now!!

It's very normal and doesn't sound like anything to worry about. Easier to say than put into practice, but comparison really is the thief of joy.

Oh I typed too slowly and now I see the comparison comes from other people. Why do they do this?! Your child is so normal and honestly there is nothing to be proud about when a toddler walks or talks early, or any other developmental milestone. It means nothing.

I can’t remember with talking but DD didn’t walk until 16 months, she could walk from 9 months with a stroller. I did feel she was a little behind as a baby but absolutely no issues now she’s 6.

My little one walked late in comparison to his peers (he was close to 15 months when he took his first unaided steps). Prior to this he was crawling and crusing along furniture standing up. He only started crawling at 8 months also, again, this was late by his peers' standards. At 15 months he could say maybe "mama" but not much else.

At 18 months he was walking confidently and his vocabulary was developing every day.

He's nearly 3 now, running around and constantly talking.

At no point was I concerned about him being delayed, despite him being nearly last at developing those skills amongst his peers.

As others have suggested, speak to your HV if you still feel concerned and just keeping doing what you're doing. If your little one is mobile in some fashion, they are doing great.

Oh I know, people's comments are the worst!!! My son just turned one and SO MANY people have asked me if he's walking yet. I always be sure and say, "not quite, but he CAN do blah blah blah"

As others have said, it's an 18 month milestone not 12

DD said her first word at 14 months (similar to quack, so your DD may already be 'talking') and walked at 17 months. All those I spoke to at the time thought it was completely normal - one HV said that it's 'normal' to start walking between 6mo and 2yr, so your DD has plenty of time yet.

My guy didn't walk until 17 months. One day they just do it. Try not to worry.

My DS didn't start to take steps til 15months, he's 17 months next week and I would now class him as walking because he doesn't crawl anymore really. Still not steady enough for us to walk down the road hand in hand but he's definitely a lot sturdier now.
Also, my DS only says baba baba baba (as in babbling) and Dooooohhhh (when he sees a dog) other than that he says nothing else.
However when I say Where's Daddy, where's Nanny etc he looks right at then so he knows what I'm on about.

Don't worry OP as long as they're happy, responds and you can see him slowly but surely coming along each week then no need to worry x

I felt exactly the same as you because my DSIL x2 were both pregnant same time as me, they're daughters are younger than my DS. I kept wandering why he was 'behind' because the 1 niece was spoon feeding herself and he wasn't (still isn't) and the other 1 started walking at 11 months.
I kept comparing but he's getting there eventually so I'm not worried now (infact in other areas he is in front of them)
All babies are different and all babies develop at their own pace.

Ps - don't wish for her to walk too quickly because when they do start..... you've had it!! 😂 I miss the newborn days now when I could sit him down and do bits. Now.... I'm finding him putting toys down the toilet, tipping the dog bowl up and all sorts within the matter of a split second !!! It's relentless

I understand how you feel OP.

DS2 is almost 13months and not walking yet, but showed signs of bring an early walker. He says 'dada, mama, nana, baba' and 'buh' for bus. All fine in itself, but DS1 was saying 5-6 words by the same age and walked very soon after his 1st birthday.

There's been so much comparison of both DCs and, since DS1 was (and still) is quite articulate for his age. There's been this expectancy for DS2 to be an early walker. Since 10 months there's been 'is he walking yet?'. It can really get a parent down and begin to worry.

However my rational side knows he is absolutely fine.

Dont worry OP, 14 months is still little. My DS started walking independently later than all his (younger) friends but he got there. It's hard not to compare but they all get there at their own pace!

Sounds like she is doing fine op, they all get there at different ages. Keep doing what you are doing and encouraging with play etc. try not to worry, (know that is easier said than done) in my job I see plenty of 14mo at similar stages to yours and all fine

One of my middle girls was like that- I worried about her a lot as her older siblings were doing so much more. She wouldn't roll or sit until well after 1! But she finally got up and walked at 18 months, and 9 years later there's still not a single thing "wrong" with her!

Has your health visitor been much help in reassuring you or giving you ideas for encouragement?

My DS2 is just 14 months and also not walking. He can cruise and is constantly pulling to stand. Crawled from 9 months. Pulling to stand about 11 months. Cruising really confidently and can lower himself from standing into a squat and hold that without holding on to anything for a while. Also let's go of furniture and stands unaided sometimes (few times a day) but is pretty wobbly so I expect he's finding his balance.

Constantly get questions about how he's lazy and not walking. Getting to me a bit.

He doesn't talk much but I've noticed him trying to copy sounds a lot now. Can say cat, dada, woo-woo ("woof woof" for a dog) and uh-oh and gone. He seems to be really trying to copy sounds so maybe he's focusing on talking instead of walking!

I'm sure they'll all get there in the end. But it's nice to see I'm not the only one getting a bit frustrated!

Thanks all for your reassurance - I'm actually between health visitors at the moment as we've moved so have been discharged from the old team and awaiting assignment to a new one. My old one was always very reassuring about DD's development. The babe is a very feisty character and will absolutely not do things unless she wants to. She's been eating by herself since about 7mo after refusing all baby food, refuses to let me put food on a spoon as SHE has to do it, and is very very active in the crawling sense. She is always yapping away and is steady at walking even holding one hand so I don't know whether she's choosing not to walk independently because she just prefers to crawl or what!

My daughter didn’t start walking until 17 months. She used to shuffle as well, and my HV said babies who bum shuffle may talk longer to start walking. HV also said it’s perfectly normal for babies to start walking anytime until 18 months. Easier said than done but try not to worry.