Is it too late to start sleep training at 17months

[ijustcouldntthinkofausername]

DS has never been a good sleeper.
I'd hoped once he was walking it would wear him out and he'd sleep better.
But he's getting worse! Last night being the worst night ever! He went down about 8:20pm after bottle then did his usual longer stint until around 1:30am but then between 1:30 - 4am he was wide awake and hyperactive. Then awake for the day right as reign at 6:10! Meaning he only had around 7.5h sleep. And he only naps for about 1-1.5h maximum during the day. This kid just doesn't need sleep!?

Is it too late to try the Ferber method now?
Any advice appreciated 🙏🏻

What happens when he's wide awake at those times? Is he crying/happy? Does he sleep in a cot/co-sleep? Sounds exhausting!

I could be wrong, but is there a sleep regression around 15 or 18 months? Maybe that's the source of your problems!

@Topjoe19 he sleeps in cot side of my bed still because he used to wake up screaming in his own room like he was frightened and then I'd struggle to settle him.

He does normally end up in bed with me when he wakes up around 1:30ish and until recently he did used to settle but I should say the last week or so he doesn't even settle when he's in with me. He is fidgety, playful and happy wanting to stand up, rock the bed guard or stand up and bang the neighbours wall 😩
He just seems so hyperactive all the time he barely sits still through the day either. Full of energy!
I don't know if putting him back in his room and if sleep training him will do the trick but I suppose it's better to try it now even if it's a little later on in his life l. I just need a good night bloody sleep I do a lot of driving for work 😴

This was when we sleep trained! I was at my wits end it only took a night. All so much happier now.

Please don’t leave him to cry, it’s cruel. He’s had your love and cuddles so far.. don’t make him feel like you don’t care now.
my first was like this with awake stints in the night and not enough overall sleep. But he grew out of it. My youngest still wakes once a night at almost 5.
All children are different but they do eventually get the hang of it. It’s absolutely exhausting I know but anything could be contributing to this at the moment for you - the heat, sleep regression etc.
does he get enough exercise during the day?

It sounds so tiring, also frustrating for you. Could you perhaps do a bedtime reset, get his bedroom prepared for him to go back into it? Stay with him to fall asleep/whenever he wakes but don't get him up just stay there & support him (shush/reassure) until he goes back to sleep? It may take a couple of weeks but work towards gradually retreating? He will probably protest & cry. Alternatively you could try a ferber type controlled crying but I could never personally do that. No judgement if that's what works! My 2.5 yo still wakes at night though, although they're usually brief now & back to sleep. It's very hard coping with sleep deprivation.

@Emeraldopal I'm so glad to hear this bit of good news 🙏🏻

@DSGR I know exactly what you're saying as I hate to hear him cry but by looking at the Ferber method way you are not leaving them to cry it out for a long time it starts with 1 minute then gradually increases. To be honest I know me and my husband knows me and if he cries it does distress me and I will end up knocking it on the head anyway if it gets too much. I won't let it go too far.

I am just struggling because I work full time, I drive long distances and on top I am doing a degree in my spare time. I have considered knocking the degree on the head tbf but I'm going to try and sort little man's sleep out first before I do that 💪🏻 it's just hard to concentrate sometimes I need match sticks to hold me eyes open

I have Dr Ferber's book. We haven't used it yet but it covers waking for a while in the night and I think a lot of the examples/case studies are toddlers rather than babies. It's a good book. We didn't agree with sleep training when we had our first daughter and she did get better in her own time but it was awful for us. Since then I've had another baby I've looked into the evidence for and against sleep training and spoken to friends who've done it and I feel more positive about it. If my 15 month old's sleep gets worse I may use it.

Sleep training gets such a bad rep but my personal opinion is that you are giving your child the best gift you can give - the ability to self settle and sleep well at night! Sleep is so crucial for development and a happy child. We did a really gentle version of the Ferber method - we went in regularly (1/2/3 min gaps never more) and I reassured and told my DD I loved her, kissed her and helped her cuddle her teddies before I went back out each time. It worked within about 2 days and she is now a fantastic sleeper. To your point about sleeping in your room - we’ve been through some challenging periods and she was never able to sleep properly when she was in with us either. We have a much happier and brighter baby after sleep training, I don’t know what I would have done without it.

It's never too late to sleep train, you may have to adjust things slightly for an older kid but teaching independent sleeping skills is always a valid choice!