Just want a party

[rosale]

So to add at the start ds is my world, he's the best thing that's ever happened to me and I wouldn't change a thing.

However, before having ds I was such a party person. Ds was planned and wanted massively, but maybe I didn't realise the extent my life was going to change.

Ds is 2, i just want to have a party. I want to decide spontaneously that I'm going to go out with my friends that night (impossible due to childcare as my dp works all over the place hours and I don't have anyone else who I can ask without making proper plans).

I feel trapped! I want to get drunk, I want to dance like I have no cares, I want to be free and single and feel young again! I can't shake this feeling at the moment.

Will I just feel like this always now?! Will it go away? It's always been there a little but at the moment it is so intense! In reality I don't want this I want to be the loving mum that I am, but I can't stop thinking about it.

Thinking dp is boring and I want to go out to have some fun! I would never cheat on dp and I love him wholeheartedly, the temptation is just massive!

I think your feelings of missing your old life are very normal. We can love our DC with all our hearts and miss our old life terribly too.

I think the best way to deal with your feelings about partying would be to make advance plans to go out with your friends. It's not ever going to be quite the same as pre-children as you can't be spontaneous like you mentioned. You just have to plan time for your interests in advance and work out childcare so you can be 'you' for a bit.

It's not quite the same as it would have been pre-children but I think this is true of any interest or hobby for any parent. You don't get as much time to do these things but you certainly can carve out time for yourself.