Dummy

[weronikaG]

My 6 month old daughter was sleeping like a dream from 7pm till 7am, however every single night at 4 am she woke up and needed her dummy. She would be asleep as long as the dummy was in, which meant I was up from 4 am every day popping this thing back in her mouth so everybody else in the house could sleep.

However I had enough of being constantly tired and people telling me "ohh you should be the most rested mum in the world with your baby sleeping so well" but they didn't know the full story.

So we are 3 nights in with no dummy and it is hell! Screaming to go down for a nap, screaming to go to sleep and screaming at 4am. I have read so much advice about going cold turkey and no one says what to do when they are screaming. When I pat her tummy, sing, sit with her the screaming gets even louder. I tried rocking her to sleep but as soon as I tried to put her down into the cot she went hysterical, I tried putting her down awake and she is having none of it. Before I used to pop the dummy in and she was happily asleep in seconds and now I'm afraid she is getting upset when we are heading for bed.

I do not know what to do.

Has anybody got any other advice for me PLEASE?

Anything that worked for you?
How long will this phase last?
I am exhausted, stressed beyond imagination but I am determined to kick this thing as I am afraid it will be even more difficult later on.

Any advice would be welcomed, as I am broken hearted .

TIA
Weronika

Give her the dummy back! And place a few near her head - won't be long before she can pop one back in herself.

Give her the dummy back! At 6 months she's nearly ready to be able to do it herself.

Or you have to swap the dummy for anothet comforter, you can't just take the thing that comforts her away and then wonder why she is crying.

Honestly 1 30 second wake up at 4am shouldn't make you that tired? Wake up, put dummy in, go back to sleep 🤷🏼‍♀️

Give the dummy back. I’m a couple of weeks she’ll be able to find it and pop it back in herself. It really isn’t worth all this stress.

Right....
Any other advice that I can actually use? :)
Giving dummy back is not a path I would like to take. Plese respect MY choice.
TIA
Weronika

Replace dummy with a different form of comfort for baby. You have literally just taken their comfort and expect them to deal with it. Or deal with the crying if you won't. Honestly dummies are so much easier to remove when they are older anf understand the concept of dummy fairy/bribery etc. A 6 month old doesn't understand why you won't give them the thing that comforts them, sucking is how babies calm themselves.

Your OP doesn't say you don't want to give dummy back 🤷🏼‍♀️

Sorry to ask the obvious question, why did you introduce a dummy to comfort a baby, to then take it away when they can't understand why?
I would give the dummy back until they can understand giving it up

I know you've made your decision but my DS had a dummy until his second birthday. We did the whole giving your dummy's to the babies and swap for a gift and he understood and never asked for it again nor did he fuss. He then found one in the house a few days later and said "for the babies" and gave it back so it really might be worth just waiting till then are happy to give it up as it caused no stress or exhaustion at all

I can’t understand why you went down the dummy route if you were determined to give it up so soon. Several in the cot and and they soon learn to find them themselves. Seems like you have chosen a very hard path to withdraw a dummy at 6 months and expect her to just get over it. She may find her thumb and you are never withdrawing that. Mine were taught dummies were only for sleeping. So withdrawing when older wasn’t a big issue. I think all you can do is try to introduce an alternative. Not sure how that’ll go given she’s so young. Sorry I can’t help with ideas as I’d never have done what you are doing.

This!!!

Right....
Any other advice that I can actually use? :)

Giving dummy back is not a path I would like to take. Plese respect MY choice.

Well you didn’t explicitly say you were so against giving it back, and I’m afraid it’s the no brainier answer.

There is not advice you can ‘actually use’ other than that.
You’ve given a baby a source of comfort, it’s too young to understand why, so yeah, crying will ensue 🤷‍♀️ You’ll just have to deal with it.
Asking for an answer to stop your baby crying in this scenario is like asking ‘where can I find a tree that grows money’. Everyone answers - ‘err they don’t exist.’
You reply ‘Uh, not helpful…any other answers??’

I know you say it’s your choice but honestly, it sounds like she’s really struggling without the dummy. I’d give the dummy back and get a comforter that had tags to attach similes (I think those are ok after 6 months but maybe double check). We had a phase of dd needing us to put the dummy back in but by 8 months she was totally able to find it herself (unless she had launched it). I’m planning to take it away when she can understand. I did the same with ds with breastfeeding at 2 and he totally got it and gave it up no problem.

also if you sing/shush/pat you might end up with a baby who needs that (lots of effort) rather than popping the dummy in (little effort)

Sorry, dummies not similes 🤦🏻‍♀️!

Again This ^^

Also I'm sorry it pissed you off but people are absolutely right to point out only having to wake once at 4am is bloody amazing sleep for a baby so young. Give her back the dummy and make you're lives a million times easier.

I genuinely feel sorry for your baby tbh. Poor little thing, being so distressed so frequently, completely unavoidably.

My eldest had her dummy over night until she was 3.5 and we got rid of it then with minimal issue. She's 4 now and her speech has been right at the top end of normal since she was about 2, she's generally been a pretty good sleeper since she was a newborn, and her teeth are great. Youngest is 10 months and has a dummy too. He's not a 'good' sleeper but not an awful one either.

We've just taken it away at 3.5. Was a breeze.

I think you should give the dummy back, she is only 6 months. If you give them a dummy don't expect anything other than a nightmare taking it away a few months later ! Silly

No advice just crack on with creating an anxious baby. Enjoy!

And no it won't be harder later on because they can understand to some degree the process of giving it up and join in the 'fun' of giving it up. You're making a rod for your own back. I gave both my kids dummies up at 3, the dummy fairy cane amd gave them to the babies, and it was a piece of piss!

I also don't understand that you used it for comfort then took it away.
I would give it back.
They soon learn to put it in themselves, get the glow in the dark ones and put afew in her cot

To add,
Your making this hell for you both. Give the baby her dummy 😭

However I had enough of being constantly tired and people telling me "ohh you should be the most rested mum in the world with your baby sleeping so well" but they didn't know the full story.

What's the rest of the story?
Because if she's only waking once for the dummy back in and straight back to sleep that's actually really good?

It's easier to take the dummy away when they're old enough to know what's happening.
Just to add, babies are meant to wake up at night. If you mean she's repeatedly waking up from 4am.... feed her?

She's only 6 months old. Give her a dummy.

Take it away when she's 2/3 and can UNDERSTAND why.

As it stands you've took away her comfort and she doesn't have a clue why.

Listen to your baby.

Give her the dummy.

Get a clip so she can find it. Restrict it to sleep only.