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Original poster

Help with night terrors

13 replies

Nightterrors1 · 08/08/2022 00:13

Does anyone have any tips on how best to handle them?

I absolutely hate them, DS (4y old) sounds so distressed I can't help but go to him but it just makes him way way worse.

I just got woken up to the sound of him hitting his head against the wall so i can't just leave him but then when I walked in and he started screaming and telling me to go away and throwing things at me.

Just awful.

He only ever has them when ill. He just has a mild runny nose this week, and they are back...

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Original poster
Nightterrors1 · 08/08/2022 00:15

He also has no recollection in the morning, even though he looks completely awake when they happen. He's the most chilled out happy child in the day so it's the weirdest thing ever.

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VittysCardigan · 08/08/2022 00:22

My youngest used to have this when he was younger - although older than 4. Used to talk to him to calm him down and then try and get him to talk about something real. I found that i had to make sure he was awake before i settled him back down or it would happen again. I would get him to tell me the name of his teacher or similar as it seemed to make him have to focus & think.
It is horrible watching them go through it. He wouldn't remember anything in the morning either. I found being hot and/or overtired would be triggers.

hormonalhandbag · 08/08/2022 00:33

It can also be link to being over tired.
We've spent months trying to avoid our night terror three year from day napping... but repairing we were making it worse.
It might be a but harder to get to off but it does reduce episodes.
I suffer from sleep issues and as a kid walked and talked, at 38 I've just been diagnosed with ADHD. Not saying that's linked to night terrors but the other sleep stuff it was a sign for me. When I was disturbed it would upset me when I was walking as it would wake me up and if feel co l fused. So my mum just used to tell me to go back to bed / everything's okay/
Watching my do think it's different.
Sometimes I don't say a word just get in width him. Sometimes he doesn't seem to know to know who we are, it's horrible :-(

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Original poster
Nightterrors1 · 08/08/2022 00:36

Oh thank you that gives me something to try next time, asking him a question to get him to focus. Cuddling him is out of the question as he gets more distressed, I think he thinks he's getting physically attacked and needs to defend himself or something?

I think you are right about making sure he's fully awake before settling back down, he wasn't earlier, and I can hear him now, I think it's starting to happen again.

How is your little one now? Sometimes I worry that maybe it's a sign of something else? Like he has feelings he's suppressing through the day and they come out at night? It just seems so extreme, almost like a double personality!

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Original poster
Nightterrors1 · 08/08/2022 00:41

Cross posted, previous comment was to @VittysCardigan

@hormonalhandbag so interesting as I walked and talked in my sleep as a child too. I would actually swear in my sleep (never swore in real life!). I've also been thinking about ADHD the last few months because of my anxiety.

I did wonder if he got the "sleep craziness" from me.

Yes he doesn't seem.to know who I am, so sad :(

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VittysCardigan · 08/08/2022 00:42

Mine is 15 now and it's been years since he's had an episode. He gives me the terrors now! Smile

Triffid1 · 08/08/2022 00:44

Over tiredness was 100% ds' trigger. So I am not surprised that yours is illness. We found we would be with him, talking quietly to him and possibly gently touching his back helped. I would be trying to wake him gently because once he knew who we were and was alert enough he would usually go back to sleep.

It's awful though. You have my sympathies.

SeaToSki · 08/08/2022 02:06

I found that getting mine to take a sip of water would bring them round just enough. Something about the physical action of swallowing was helpful. If he is ina. Fight or flight mood, I would suggest a sippy cup or it might accidentally end up everywhere

Delphinium20 · 08/08/2022 02:53

My youngest had them...and yes, they are terribly unnerving. I feel for you, OP as it's hell to watch. My DD is now a teen and she has zero issues w/ sleep or any other health/psychological health. I don't know why, but night terrors just happens to some kids. She had no memory of them. I just tried not to wake her, tried to keep her from hurting herself and prayed for them to be over soon. She outgrew them around 7 or 8. Good luck.

Delphinium20 · 08/08/2022 02:53

Second the sip of water...that calmed mine down as well.

Topjoe19 · 08/08/2022 08:20

My 4 yo had them, they were awful. We found a weighted blanket helped loads. Also using a red night light. Make time in the day (not bedtime) to connect, space to talk about any anxieties/worries or anything that's caused upset. Bedtime to be as calm as possible too.

PippinStar · 08/08/2022 08:31

Do they happen at the same / similar time each night? If so, wake / rouse them 15 mins before the expected time each night for 7 nights. That disrupts the cycle. It worked for us. It’s explained in this link.
NHS night terrors

Original poster
Nightterrors1 · 08/08/2022 09:31

Thank you for the tips! I'll definitely try the water trick, with a closed cup in case he feels like throwing it at me :D.

It does mostly occur shortly after midnight so worth a try @PippinStar thank you for the link!

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