My poor poor baby

[Threefiftytwo]

Today has been the worst day of my life.
My 4 month old son had an injury earlier, he was strapped in his buggy asleep and the wind blew the buggy and he injured his face. I did not see this happen, he was being watched by a family member. I heard him cry and thought he had woke from his nap and then I saw the blood and family member explained what had happened.
we are abroad on holiday.
So I took him to the nearest hospital. When we got there the doctor and nurses said they wanted to take his blood. I said okay. They then asked me to leave the room whilst they did it. I said no. They explained it was protocol because baby’s get more upset if mummy is there and not doing anything to stop. I told them I wasn’t comfortable with them doing it without me there. They said okay fine. They then asked me to go get him a nappy because he needed changing as they were testing his urine too, I said okay. His changing bag and buggy was in a separate room. As I’m walking back into the room he is in I see the nurse seconds away from inserting the needle. She had already put the thing round the veins to tighten the skin and he was crying. They took ages to take the blood he was screaming as expected. When it was finally over they said they needed to do the other arm as they didn’t get enough blood. I said no, I didn’t want him to go through that again. They then said they needed to do an X Ray and ultrasound. Both lasted about 10 minutes. He screamed his head off the whole time for both. Nurses and doctors were very aggressive with him, pinning him down, flipping him over very abruptly. Not gentle at all.
long story short. He is okay. No concussion (which was what I was worried about.) however he does have an injury to the nose which needs to be seen by a specialist so will have to go private for that tomorrow.
i feel like such a failure. I failed to protect him. Watching him scream like that in hospital and not been able to help him. I’m not sure I can ever forgive myself my heart is torn to pieces.

These things happen and your baby will not remember any of it so stop beating yourself up about it , realistically a baby is going to cry if someone is taking blood and whilst it’s horrible to see your child in distress it is short term pain / discomfort . Hope his nose is ok .💐

I totally understand how upsetting that would have been for you but I promise he won’t be traumatised.

We had a similar incident and DS was 5 months and was utterly beside himself. He finally screamed himself to sleep. I hardly slept that night I thought we had completely broken him and that he would change personality. I was a mess.

He woke up gurgling and smiling like he did every other morning. It was completely fine.

I still feel a bit sick when I think about it!!!

As others have said, it will have been incredibly upsetting for you but your baby won't remember a thing.

DD was born with clicky hips and had to have regular ultrasound scans. She cried every time. I found it incredibly stressful. She doesn't remember any of this.

When she was 11 months old, we were on holiday and went on a boat trip to a waterfall. She got cold and wet and cried the whole time. I felt awful. The next morning, she woke up with a smile on her face and we had a lovely day.

When she was a toddler, she fell down some steps in a bus and had a gash on her forehead. We were on holiday abroad at the time. When we finally arrived at the next city, we found a hospital and she had to have stitches. I was able to stay with her and hold her hand but she spent the whole time saying, "Mummy, make it stop". Stressful for her and horrendous as a parent. Again, she was perfectly happy the next morning and can't remember the experience at all now.

Accidents happen. We feel terrible, it's upsetting for our LOs at the time but they soon get over them and we need to put them behind us too.

Did they not have one of those little plastic forms that they strap babies down in for procedures like ultrasound or xrays? Not pleasant but it saves unnecessary handling.

Hope your baby will be OK.

Brakes should always be engaged when a buggy is parked or not being held.

And to reassure you, my DS went through a period of eating nothing but plain cheerios when he was about 1.

I took him for a routine checkup and mentioned his diet of course. Cue a blood draw to check him for anemia. The nurse couldn't find a vein despite trying half a dozen times. Poor baby was purple in the face and screaming. I said, 'Please, stop'.. and she did, but went to get someone else to try. I said, 'No way, we're going home'.

DS has no memory of this. He was a picky eater until he turned 16. We changed to another pediatric practice shortly after this incident. The nurses were really crap.

Don't stress about it, the procedures were presumably necessary, probably better they were done quickly rather than prolong it. Your role in the situation is to be calm so baby can pick up from you that it's ok even if they're upset.

Oh hi, your baby and you have had an awful day. for you.

I have had to watch one of mine have a quite a bit of medical care, it is very upsetting. I had some scary situations due to urgency and at first it felt dreadful.

My advice is stop thinking and just accept your feelings are natural. But the feelings should fade away over time.

We wish we could protect our babies from all hurt, but we can't, we can only love them while life happens. None of this was your choice, it was an accident and the resulting medical care was what doctors said was the right thing to do. Be gentle on yourself for the next few days while your brain processes it.

Oh you poor thing. It is physically painful to see your baby in distress like that but I promise you that it is so much more traumatic for you than him, he won’t remember. You are in no way a failure! Accidents happen and you did all the right things by bringing him to be checked out. I am sorry they weren’t gentle enough with him though. I still shudder when I remember the repeated botched blood tests one of mine had to have as a baby, he is totally fine now of course! Hope you can have lots of cuddles now.

I had to watch my newborn have a massive needle in there leg three times until they asked me to leave the room- and all she got was sugar water- I was hysterical so was she and on my own. I know the feels-

It's hard to let doctors and nurses do their jobs when it comes to our children but we have to. We can't always be there when everything happens, as hard as it is. And in my experience, being there as mum makes the child even more distressed - they expect me to take them away from the discomfort, rather than just sort of getting on with it, and become more distressed when I don't. This is why being a mum is so hard, moments like this. Baby won't remember, and definitely won't be traumatised!