Why do I feel threatened by my SIL?

[Janie92]

Hi all, I'd like a bit of advice, and just to understand if I'm not the only one who feels a bit like this!

My SIL is my DH sister, I have a DS who's 2 (my first child) and she has an older girl (5) and a younger DS (1).

We have never been the best of friends, but we get on well when do see each other, everything is very nice and we always bond over the struggles of raising small children..

I've realised though, since her little boy has been getting out of the baby stage, I suddenly feel threatened and weirdly competitive with her, in general as well as about our DSs... I don't know why I feel like this as I'm not usually someone who struggles with low self-esteem.

If I see photos of their family day out on social media, I suddenly start thinking "we need to do a day out like that soon", it's like I'm making comparisons of our worth as mothers or something!
I don't know why I'm being like this and id like it to stop as it's just unnecessary feelings that don't actually help anything.

Any tips for how to get over this competitive flair I've suddenly got? I'm worried it's going to get worse when the boys are older and I don't want to be like that.. X

Armchair psychiatrist in me says the similarities in your lives are giving you a platform to air all your own insecurities. Do you have the cash to pay for a couple of months of therapy to work through your feelings of inadequacy?

Have you done this with other women in your life? Competed with them?

I think you are jealous and insecure so you are trying to copy her.

if you can’t force yourself to stop then I think go for therapy as you’re going to do some damage as there is kids involved and it will continue and as they age they will become aware of your issues.