what age to let child go out with friends

[alliwannado]

Hi just wondering if anyone has any advice about what age to let their child out to play. My son 8 is pestering me to go out and meet up with his friends at a local park. To this day I have never let him out really without us, he must always stay close/in view........ but recently this is getting harder because he wants to go out, have a bit of freedom. At what age do you this this is ok? I was thinking Yr 6 or at earliest Yr 5. so maybe 9.5 or 10, is that too old? am I being unreasonable. I trust my son but worry about roads etc.

Depends on the child, tbh, some are more sensible than others, ds walked himself (with a couple of friends admittedly (sp))to school at 9 and he went to the park with his friends around 8. We can see the park from our bedroom window.

i suppose it would depend on if he had to cross roads etc. is it far? is your area pretty safe?
my dp's ds is 9 and he is allowed to go outside with his friends who live nearby on his own but not far and not at night (obviously), i totally understand about worrying, especially roads, dp's ds has a tendancy to day dream and they can be easily distracted at that age.

Depends where they are going! DD was allowed to go into town at 12, we took her and we picked her up after an hour and a half. Gradually between the 3 of us (DH< Me and DD)she is now allowed out when she wants as long as she tells us where she is going, who with etc. Have to say is is in with a nice crowd and I have no worries if they go to the next town on the train. DD has realised that if she is honest with us, we trust her a lot more!

Depends on where you live too. DD(6) is allowed to go to her friend house to call for her ad when the weather and light allows to play on the street opposite. We live on a new housing estate with lots of families with youngish children. The streets don't lead to anywhere so traffic is minimal and littered with speed humps. If we lived near main roads or town centres I wouldn't let her go.

My DS is 10 and doesn't go out yet. Mainly because we live to far from town/park for him to be safe going alone.
He will be going to secondry school next year and will have to walk there without me so that wil be a good age for me to start letting him out!

I think our area is pretty safe, but then again who ever knows? he'd have 1 road to cross to get to his friends, and then no roads to park. Wondering whether I should meet him half way initially and walk him across road and give him 2hrs or so and a mobile phone? think start off strict and see if he is sensible enough and gets back on time as to whether I loosen the reigns a little. Is a mobile phone over the top? or maybe I should take him to the park and let him go off/disappear for hour or 2 and meet him back at park. My god, so worried but I know the time is coming, he will be 9 this yr so I know can't lock him up forever.

When we let DD out alone for the first few times in the street, we made sure she had a watch and every 30 mins she had to report back. (that was her responsibility) We then moved it to an hour then gradually moved it to an hour and a half. Then she had free range, but all the time she was a ware where she could and couldn't!

Roads, I think are the real worry, we used to watch ds across the road, although near, you have to cross a road to get to our park. I never let ds have a mobile until he was 12, they weren't allowed them in school anyway so no point.
And I was absolutely sure that he wouldn't go off with someone to see their football card collection or whatever, that's why I let him go.

thanks everyone, made our decision not to let him go. It wasn't resting well with us which meant really I didnt feel right about it. He was very angry and upset with us for saying that he cant go off on his own but hey we are the parents/adults and its down to us. think it will be another yr at least before I will consider it, hes still so much a little child in his ways and hasn't much road sense and too much trust in people too.
thanks everyone

it is really hard. you have to trust your own instincts about what is right for your child (not just do what others are doing).... i think 8 is quite young still. can he not go with you to park, meet mates with you staying in park for an hour but keeping a discreet distance to give him a bit of space.....? this is what i do with ds2 (8). sit on bench and read a book. but i am there if he needs me.... meant i was there when his friend broke his arm!