Feeling like a really awful mum - please can you tell me honestly if my toddler sounds normal?

[Changeofnamebecause]

DS is 19 months and he has been full time at nursery since he was 8.5 months.

This is what he can do - say mama/mum, daddy, baby, cat, car, tractor, Hiya/hello, bye bye, ta (thanks) cak-cak (quack quack - duck) yes, no.

He walks and runs, is adventurous and fearless, will climb up steps to get on a slide, get in and out of a toy car or similar, not scared to try new things.

Laughs loads, babbles almost constantly but only has the above words at the moment.

He understands things but sometimes doesn’t always seem to fully comprehend. So I will ask if he wants a drink and he will say no or shake his head but then have a drink anyway. Knows the actions to songs like sleeping bunnies, dingle dangle scarecrow, wind the bobbin up etc

Can drink out of one of those cups with handles but sometimes pours on the floor

Can feed himself but struggles with some foods. Sometimes resorts to fingers. Gets annoyed if I try to help.

So all that sounds positive (I think.) But here are the things I’m worried about.

He can be very aggressive with other children. If we are at a group and someone else has a toy he will try to shove them away and/or snatch it. I’m on it and I don’t let him. But he has bitten children at nursery. Never with me but he has shoved / snatched.

He then has a real meltdown to being told no. Yesterday went on a game with a friend and her child, exactly the same age. Both children didn’t want it to end, her little girl just said ‘again, again!’ Mine had an absolute screaming meltdown, roaring his head off and had to be carried away

Its mostly the meanness towards others and the very over the to reactions to not getting his way … I’m worried I’ve spoilt him a bit? Does he sound OK?

He’s sounds totally normal to me! Both my girls were late in the speech department as were my grandchildren-but by 4 it was non stop talking 😂
the aggression could come from him just being overwhelmed and not having the communication or u understanding to say how he feels or what he needs.As hard as it is try not worry and don’t compare your child to anyone else’s either.They all develop in totally different ways

He sounds really normal to me OP but trust your instincts. Comprehension is more important than speech. Nursery should be clear on whether there's any special needs or anything out of the ordinary have you spoken to them?

Thank you

Does anyone have any tips on how to manage biting / snatching / aggression? I’ve read teeth are not for biting with him, but it’s mostly just I don’t want him being a bully!

Nursery don’t seem to have any concerns but they do tell me when he’s bitten and comment that he’s very boisterous (which I think is a nice way of saying aggressive) with other children. They do also say it’s very normal and often peaks around this age.

My friends children just seem much more gentle, and not as loud either.

You need to breathe! Toddlers can be vicious and it's normal. Assume nursery will have their eye on him.