Feeling guilty about working full time

[August21yellowbaby]

I have a beautiful happy 11 month old baby boy. I went back to work when he was 9 months old but only 2 days a week. But it was 12 hour shifts so I hardly saw him at all them days.

I’ve been offered a very good job, which will make me financially stable for the first time in years

but it’s Monday - Friday 8am-4pm

the guilt is already eating me alive and I can’t stop crying

am I over thinking it? I feel like I’m never going to spend good time with him. I’m going to miss our days just us through the week, I’m going to miss going to his baby classes

has anyone else felt like this before returning to full time work? Did it ease once you started?

I just want to do right by him 😢

You're overthinking it, lots of women work full time and still provide a loving, supportive homes for their children. It's not going to do him any harm. Yes you will be busy but you will still get plenty of quality time and probably enjoy the time you have with him more. He will be just fine with whatever childcare arrangement you've arranged. Needs must and he will benefit hugely from your financial stability in the long term.

Honestly I went back to work full time at 4m and didn't give it a second thought. DD is nearly 3 and we have tonnes of wonderful time together.

Being a SAHM is way over rated and most people, if they were honest, would tell you they would sooner be at work. The plain honest truth is that babies and toddlers really don’t mind who is looking after them. It’s when they are older that children really need their mum.If you are happy and fulfilled and financially stable you will be better able to spend quality time with DS. Take the job, relax , enjoy your work and enjoy your DS when you are home.

It will be fine and you will both get used to it very quickly. There is no need to feel guilty; he'll thrive and be happy in good quality childcare and your bond will remain strong. The financial security this job will bring will benefit the whole family. You can go on a day trip every weekend and you might find a weekend baby class (we have swimming and Saturday Tumble Tots round here). Or skip the toddler classes and make the most of free weekends as it won't be long before you're running your son to weekend sports/dance/drama classes and classmates parties! If it doesn't work for your family then reassess in a few months.

I went back full-time when my first daughter was 7 months and again when my second daughter was 13 months.