ADHD in toddler girl

[Charlielilu]

Hi!
I've been looking into symptoms for adhd in girls because I THINK my nearly 3 year old daughter might have it. Her symptoms are:

•sometimes walking on tip toes
•picking at her fingernails
•random outbursts of energy (gets tense and smiles and shakes for 2 seconds) when doing something quiet (like reading, watching something)
•moves on from a task quickly (jumps from playing with her duplo, dolls, colouring all within 10 mins)
•very chatty and has a wild imagination
•tantrums and crying when she doesn't get what she wants very quickly and extremely
•always on the tail end of reaching her milestones. We're currently struggling through potty training.
•hates loud noise, like music street performers for example, that other kids seem fine with.

I hope I've explained her behaviour well. Reading it back it sounds like normal behaviour, but it's all that x 100.
She is also super happy and wild in the best way!

Just wondering if any mummies have daughters with similar behaviour and got a diagnosis?

Have you looked at autistic traits in girls? I don't have an adhd child but I do assessments for autism/adhd and this would have me leaning towards autism a bit more although it's maybe wrong of me to say based on not much information! She's also really young and we wouldn't look to assess someone for adhd until they were school age as it needs to be evident in more than one setting (eg home and at school).I think just wait and see, it might be that as she gets older things become more apparent or it might be that nothing comes of it!
She sounds like a great kid!

Thank you, she is a dream! And I'm not in a rush to get her diagnosed with something. I just worry how her "slightly dramatic" reaction to things will be dealt with when she starts nursery next month 😖 a part of me wants to speak to the nursery about it but the other part doesn't want her to instantly be labelled with it.
I was wondering if maybe she is on the autistic spectrum. But its so hard to stop my brain running away with itself down this rabbit hole!

Have you (or other adults around her) begun to teach her how to regulate her emotions? What you’re describing sounds pretty normal for a nearly 3yr old who is still working out how to do that.

I think at that age it’s too young to tell.

Sounds like a perfectly normal 3year old.

She's still two. Two is tiny. Of course her attention span is short. She's two.

Yeah, to echo PPs, she sounds completely normal to be honest OP! Toddlers are weird little creatures :-)

I thought my DD had ADHD when she was 2 years old, I was also told that it was normal behaviour and not to worry. My now 8 year old DD was diagnosed with autism last year. If I were you I would monitor the behaviours, keep notes and mention it to nursery so they can be on the look out too. It might be nothing but there is no harm in keeping an on it and speaking to nursery about your concerns.

Yes, since she could understand we talk her through it and try and teach her how to regulate. Talk about it after the meltdown, etc.

Thanks for the lovely reassurance.

Yeah, I think that's what i'll do. Keep a quiet eye on it and see if nursery mention anything.

She's definitely within normal development expectations.

See if you can get hold of the book "Your Three Year Old" (or your two year old) by Louise Bates Ames. I think you'll find it a very reassuring read, it's not long. This is an example of a page from it showing how children typically move between different "stations" in a nursery school at different ages. You can see that moving on from an activity before 10 minutes (just for one example) is perfectly normal and expected.

Images are useless on here - try this cropped version

To be honest apart from the tiptoes this described my daughter at that age. She's almost 5 now and finishing reception and hasn't had any issues. I think she's highly sensitive but I don't suspect adhd or ASD

Normal here. And thanks to lockdown potty training was never an issue here. Tried at two, nope. Tried at nearly three, got sick bug. Tried at three, no chance. Started to worry, lots of peer pressure. I said would you like to try pants today, yes please, job done.

They are all different. For her, she rejected being trained and wanted to decide herself. She did same with talking. Never said a word until nearly 2.5 then started sentences. Her wee sister is different, chatting like anything at 18 months and I probably should try potty training but in no rush.

ADHD isn’t formally diagnosed until at least six, to recognise that many young children display behaviour which could be symptomatic or could be normal. I would focus on helping her with self-regulation as you are doing, and maintain routines etc. It’s too soon to push for assessment.

DS2 was 3.9 when we potty trained and it was done in a day. Brilliant, much better than the long hard slog with DS1 trying to get it done in time for nursery!

How is her sleep? She sounds a lot like a normal almost 3 years old. I have a DD who had similar behaviour and is now 12 and diagnosed with ADHD. One of the biggest indicators for us was a disruption in her sleep patterns. I didn’t know at the time but this can be a sign of ADHD or autism. If I had known this I think it would o have really helped to point me towards this sooner. I don’t mean a slightly bad sleeper. I mean waking up through the night. Having a really hard time falling asleep. Dropping their nap from a very young age.

Just to add. She has had a lot of support and is doing brilliantly. Even if it does turn out to be adhd with help things improve drastically with age. 2-3 years old is hard no matter what.

Stopped napping at around 18 months, goes through phases of waking up for a couple of hours in the night for a chat every month or so. Has never slept through.
I'm definitely not out to get a diagnosis at 3 year old, just after reassurance I guess 😅

Just to clarify: I know 3 is too young for a diagnosis, and I'm a psychologist so know a little bit (not an expert!) about "normal" child development. And I've been around enough kids to know her behaviour stumbles outside of "normal". And I'm not even after a diagnosis, more "my kid was like that and everything turned out fine!" reassurance. I have adhd myself and didn't get diagnosed until I was an adult and education was horrific for me and I don't want her to go through the same. Plus it presents completely different in girls than boys, my main focus isn't her lack of concentration more the walking on tiptoes, picking her fingers, stimming and daydreaming which is all usual signs of adhd in girls. But if all that is normal behaviour then great 😅

We also had the finger picking which was really concerning to me. The sleep pattern sounds like what we experienced. Not trying to worry you just confirming that your concerns are not unfounded and you are righty to be monitoring it

Hi any updates please?