Potty training - help, I've messed up!

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DD (2.5) did a wee on the potty for the first time the other day. MUCH praising and celebrating, but I completely forgot about the star chart and stickers nursery gave us to reward using the potty and gave her a couple of chocolate buttons . . . I know, I know, but I'm knackered from work and life admin and it seemed like a nice way of celebrating.

This morning, DD asked for her potty, did a wee, and then grinned happily at me and asked for her chocolate buttons. I felt I had to give her a couple as I didn't want tears and possible negative associations with the potty.

I've massively messed up, haven't I? On so many levels - rewarding with chocolate, giving in so easily . . . arrrrrgh!

A couple of chocolate buttons aren't going to do any harm fgs. You don't have to give them every time. Just start talking about how she's a big girl now using the potty all the time or whatever.

You can even switch to the star chart instead if it makes you feel better.

No you haven't messed up. You're her parent, not nursery and you chose to reward with a couple of chocolate buttons. Hardly a crime. You can just stop though if you want. I mean, you don't anticipate she'll ring you at 20 to ask for her chocolate buttons for a poo! I reckon kids can handle a bit of inconsistency between nursery and home. The key is that when the time comes it's pants at nursery and at home. If she gets a star at nursery and a chocolate button at home, I think she'll manage.

You’ve not messed up OP.
Try giving one chocolate button and a star next time.
Make a huge fuss about how brilliant a star is and then ‘run out of chocolate buttons ‘ but have a star the time after.
If dd looks upset you can magically find a button in the cupboard.
Praise is so important. And attached with the star should work too.
I have dgc now and can tell you that in years to come you will wish you’d been softer with dc not firmer.

It's fine just switch to the stars

It's fine, don't worry.

When she gets home show her a star chart you've printed off and some stickers. Explain that a wee = a sticker and a line full of stickers = a chocolate button. We found this helpful because when the chart was completed we just didn't replace it and said it's completed now. DS was rather bored of it bythat point anyway. If he had been upset then I would have invented a bigger prize/certificate to celebrate finishing the chart so that I could point to that and say you finished the chart, remember, you don't need it any more.

Or just give her a single button for every wee. It's not the end of the world and I promise you she'll stop asking for them as it becomes normal to her.

The thing about rewarding with food does not apply to a chocolate button for potty training. It's more along the lines of every achievement leading to a massive gorge fest on foods you would usually restrict - that's what builds an unhealthy association with "treat" foods. Not a completely reasonable proportional treat in context.

Thanks everyone, these responses have massively reassured me! I think I'll phase out the chocolate buttons as suggested.

I suppose I was worried on two levels - I don't want to pass my own disordered eating/food associations to my DD, and I thought consistency with nursery was crucial.

I'll unclench now . . .

Oh god OP make sure you parent your way and not the way they want you to! It sounds like you're doing a fab job.