Thinking about a third.....

[jigger]

Just wanted to know whether anyone had any thoughts to share on having a third. DS has just turned 3 & DD is 10 months old. My husband and I have talked about it and both of us think we want 3 children. Body has just about returned to normal after #2 as well so about time to kill it off again!!

DS & DD are both absolutely lovely & I love them to bits, they can be quite hard work as you would expect. Part of me says "get on with it" since DD is settled now and I haven't any plans to return to work in the near future. The other part is not so sure, not in terms of managing but, in terms of our relationship with the 2 kiddies we already have as they are so lovely. Is it a case of "the more the merrier" or will having another take away from what we already have. Or should we wait & have a bigger gap???

Would love to hear from anyone who already has 3, or if you too are thinking about it.

Ladies. If you want another, have another. We couldn't afford to have any of ours but wouldn't change it for the world. Metro: put the machine on when you pass. As the kids get older teach them to do it. Poppy: it's not too late, many women don't start before they are 40. Golds: you clearly want another, so have another. IdontknowwhatIwant: yes you do know. Go for it.

IMO if you know that you've had enough then you know. If you are unsure, then you probably do want another.

There endeth the sermon.

athomemum - agree! I like them close together too and having 3 of the same sex makes activities much easier. There are pros and cons to same or different sex though I know.

Dinosaur - I had ds3 in August too

I have three. intermittently think about 4. Three no harder than two, the more the merrier, makes for healthier sibling relationships I think as they can chop and change around and play with/look after/torment each other, it isn't as intense as a one-on-one sibling thing.
Laundry is laundry, there is a bit more, but there is masses with two anyway. And your standards will also slip slightly in terms of whether something needs a wash or not (mine certainly no longer have fresh pjs EVERY night as they used to do when I had two! etc) Go for it!

you're right pph, the sibling dynamic between two is intense

pph - lol at the PJs!! Ditto!!!

I inspect Jeans at night too - 'oooh, they'll go another day'

The other good thing about 3 is, there's a slight increase in the chances that one of them will look after you when you are old and smell of wee!!

Sorry, getting silly now

It's a real pleasure to read a thread like this when I've had an afternoon sitting here with m/s thinking "what have I done?". DS and dd will be 5 and 3 respectively when no 3 is born next year (all being well of course). Although I'm already wondering how I'm going to cope with school and nursery runs and a tiny baby, I think it will probably be worth it in the end.

Hmmmmm. I toy with the idea of three. But my period was late this month, and I realised how relieved I was when the test I frightenedly took proved to be negative. I think I just can't face it.

Gobbledigook, that's what dh says too .

Just about to pop my 3rd. Somewhat apprehensive re the potential life changing moment, altered family dynamics, total dependence of babe and loss of social life again, but I dont think I'd have it any other way.
It was when I was putting away the 12-24mo Gap socks into the attic about 10 months ago, I couldnt believe I wouldnt be having another, that it dawned on me that this was not something I was happy with. dh, fortunately was happy either way, 2or3, boy or girl, so thought we'd give it a bash. Pg the v next month! Went thru a really panic-y 6-8weeks after the +ve pg test when I thought I'd changed my mind, a "oh my god, what have I done" thing. But then started to get really excited about it. Now I cant wait!
Go for it, is my advise!

Bagpuss30 - don't worry, you just do. You just work out a routine to get you out in the morning and you just leave your house like a pig sty!!

Noooooooooo .

thanks karen01, that is lovely of you xx

Fresh pyjamas every night.... only if breakfast was spectacularly messy! And that's with one. I am officially a slob, slut and domestic disgrace. Advantage of marrying man with dd from previous relationship - three siblings, only two pregnancies! We have a ten year gap between the oldest (dh's daughter) and our son who is three, and we find a surprising number of things we can all enjoy - on different levels.

Plus a 13 year old to help you round Ikea with a three year old is a blessing and a half, I can tell you!

Ooh, how exciting Issymum!

while I love having 3 in some ways I am amazed at all these people saying 3 is easier than 2. How, exactly? I am totally knackered, personally, with 3 under 5. I would not change it but "easier than 2" - absolutely not!

That's what I said Fennel! I've got 3 under 4 and NO WAY is it easier than having 2!!!

Issy! Fantastic!

3 isn't easier than 2! But it isn't much worse. Mind you mine were 5.5 and 3 when no 3 came along, I'm sure with much younger ones it would be much more like hard work...

Arrgghh, posted a big long message about why it's so good to have 3 and the bloody Pc crashed.

Ok, try again.

I do find hard work having 3 but only because of the time issue. There simply aren't enough hours in the day to do everything and nothing is done leisurley(sp?) anymore (but I think my MN addiction may have something to do with that too!!).
However it's lovely watching them play and if ds3 gives the tiniest hint that he's about cry ds1 loves to take care of him, cuddling him or picking him up(which always gives me heart failure) and ds2 will run and find the nearest toy. They adore their little brother and spoil him rotten. It's wonderful being a mum of 3.

(would love it to be 4 one day, sadly Dh doesn't agree)

Oh, me too emmatmg (re: 4)

The reason that I thought that 3 was easier than 2 is because I had a gap of about 4 years between DD1 and DD2. There was a gap of 22months between DS1 and DD1. I still think that those that want more should have more. Yes there's more work, but to be honest if you've gotta do it for 2 then why not 3,4 or 5. Me, I just go with the flow. The house doesn't bother me (as long as it's clean). I've said it before, why clear up the mess until the mess makers have left home.

echo those who say, not that 3 is easier than 2 (!!) but that the jump from 2 to 3 is easier than 1 to 2 (just as 1 to 2 is easier than none to 1 iyswim).
I found baby no 3 fitted in to the routine we had just fine, fed when he could snatch a moment etc. The thing is (usually) by the time you are on to no 3, no 1 is old enough to be a bit of help (get himself dressed, eat food nicely etc) and often at school anyway (actually i had 3 under 4 for a while but that's not the point).
I love love love my 3 (would love 4 in a way but for various practical and other reasons we are not going to go for it).
What i especially love is how they are so differnet from each other (and not just because I've got boy girl boy). and they spark off each other and dress up and do shows for me and cuddle and fight and it's just a greatgang. I wouldn't be without 'em.
Laundry; yes,. there's a lot ((we had no washing machine for 10 days this month and the resultant backlog filled five black in bags) but 4 loads a day gdg?? that's 28 a week! I reckon I do about 10 loads a week but we hae been using disposable nappies since the summer so that's cut it I guess.
Sorry jigger, long logn post; go for it if you want to is my advice.

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