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Parenting

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Caused mayham in therapy

3 replies

Backachesandheadaches · 01/07/2022 14:41

I want to start by stating I DO NOT give permission for mumsnet to post this on other social media!

I have weekly therapy sessions as I have hit a hard patch in life.

Today's session, after having covid for the 2nd time, and having had the week having a rant and rave at DP about the origins of were our covid came from, I blurted out numerous years of issues I've had with his parents.

Bottom line is now the therapist is having to speak to her senior about potentially safeguarding issues surrounding DP parents. As I disclosed that they have on occasions been physical towards DC and that they had tried to witheld DC from myself on one occasion and on 2 occasions never told me nor DP about taking DC to the hospital for medical attention (won't put what as outing) and 1 occasion where DC fell unwell and was sucking in at the ribs and they didn't seek medical attention nor did they contact us about any of it.

There are other issues/incidents but it would take along time to write it out.

My thing is now I'm wondering if I've done something stupid by speaking about it, (I've tried for a while to talk to DP and he wasn't having any of it so in my head the next suitable person was my therapist who is literally paid to listen to me rant away) I stand by I'm not in the wrong for speaking my truth. I've had years of dealing with it, the stress and anxiety at one point made me so ill I was prescribed several antidepressants to take together which ultimately ended in mild serotonin syndrome so now I'm unable to take any antidepressants for longer than 2 weeks without the symptoms of Serontonin syndrome returning forcing me off the medication. So talking therapy is all I have to get me through hard times.

I know that if SS get involved all out war will follow. I've spent the entirety of DC life feeling forced into letting them have DC whenever they want, I've been ignored, I've been spoken to like I'm less than a cockroach, I've been told I'm a bad mother, I've been made to feel like I'm not DC mother (that's the extent of the overbearing and taking over I'm talking about), I've been made to feel like I'm crazy, and yet through everything I've remained amicable and approachable. I've tried to speak to them about the issues but always met with and these are direct quotes
'Believe what you want'
'Shut the hell up'
'Leave us alone'
'Don't speak to us'
'Whatever'
'Don't come on our property' - this was when they tried to witheld DC

I'm of the thought process that comes what may It's their fault for doing everything they have done and the only blame that lies with me is for not growing a back bone sooner.

But what do others think?

OP posts:
rahjama · 01/07/2022 14:49

I don't know how you've put up with that for so long. They sound like terrible, terrible people. If you are not comfortable with someone taking care of your child (and I wouldn't be, if I had the sort of relationship you have with them) you shouldn't allow them access.

They don't have legal rights to your child. I think you've done the right thing getting it out finally, sounds like it's done you some good, and your therapist will do further good by raising issues with the right people. Although I'm not sure what could come from it, it definitely sounds from what you've written there that you should NOT be allowing when access/unsupervised access to your child.

They should NOT be looking after your child if they cannot do so properly. Failing to inform you when they took your own child to hospital is disgusting, as is the way they speak to you in general. Not taking your child to hospital when he/she clearly needed medical attention is SO CONCERNING.

Please do what is best for you and your child

Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas · 01/07/2022 16:34

Did you honestly not realise how bad this behaviour is for your children or where you telling the therapist because you knew they would have to act? You don’t need to answer this on here but it something to think about.

fabicelolly · 01/07/2022 16:38

I'm of the thought process that comes what may It's their fault for doing everything they have done and the only blame that lies with me is for not growing a back bone sooner.

Agree. Good for you. Flowers

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