experienced mothers please help

[chibi]

I need advice, please!

I went to my postnatal coffee morning and it seems all the other mums are doing stuff to encourage standing and walking amongst other thimgs. I haven't but now I wonder if I should. All of our babies are about 7 mo, my dd is 7.5 mo.

Are you meant to do this? Should I have known this already? Is it common sense/knowledge which I lack? I don't have anyone who can advise me in real life. Is there a book I should have read?

I do play with my dd + read to her but I'm never sure of what I should be doing. I sort of though developmental stuff would sort itself out on its own but now I'm a bit worried that there are things I can and should be doing. For example, she is still not super steady when she sits + will often fall over when she reaches for stuff.

I will not be offended if you say I am a dumbass with PFB issues.

It's very easy to get worked up about this, isn't it. I've found myself getting worried because having been the first baby on my postnatal thread (not even RL LOL) to pull herself up to stand , my DD is not yet standing alone and quite a few of the others are. And talking

But my DS2 was pulling himself up and walking around the furniture at 5 months (and that was a real PITA) while my DS3 didn't even sit up until 9 months, walked at 13 months and didn't really speak until he was 2..... Now at 18 and 16 you wouldn't guess which of them did what first, and it doesn't really matter

As the others have said it sounds like you are doing everything right. You can't make a baby sit, crawl, stand or walk until it is ready.

they should be doing the learning to sit stuff at that age not walking.

there is an untalked about race with children

it starts with

"can yours hold his own head yet?"

"cn yours sit up yet?"
"can yours walk yet?....really? mine walked at 9 months..."

"potty trained yet?...mine ws dry at 12 months"

it never stops. whether you want to enter into that world is up to you.

i can tell you that the thing that will make the difference in life is education. and it wont matter a jot if your firends kid could bastard well juggle at birth

Oh chibi... - I meant when ds was really little - My poing was really that I didn't do anything like making him stand or walk - and it just happened quickly for him because he was made that way. I have lots of friends who babies got to those milestones later (whereas my ds took what felt like forever to speak!)

Now that they are all over 3, they are all walking and talking (constantly!!! We miss their quiet less exuberant selves) and all the comparisons that we worried about from babyhood seem even sillier now!

poing? point

arghh the dreaded mother and baby chats its my personal hatred for all things mother and baby for eactly this reason

if you love you child, feed them, change them keep them warm, etc this is never enough for these mom's they need there child to walk, talk, shit on a potty first

your right they are wrong {smile}

I have a friend who had 4 boys in 5 years. No1 was taken to every "development" group going and encouraged in everyway. She says that for No4, at about 7 months, when he was laying under his baby Gym on his own (again) she thought, Oh I wonder if he can sit , and he could. They all do it when they're ready.

evenhope - my DS isn't even crawling yet, much less standing up (OP - me and evenhope are on the same postnatal thread)

I think we notice the people whose DCs are advanced but those of us with not much to report don't have much to say

I tell myself he'll get there in the end

I have 4 sons - 2 of them had baby walkers - the other 2 did not - made not a blind bit of difference - all 4 crawled and walked at different ages - only worried about it with the first!

I agree with custy

There is soo much competition.

Chibi

im a mum of 6 and my advice is let dd try to walk as and when she feels ready too. All mine did it in there own pace and all of them have walked without using a buggy again from 2.5 years old.

Imo its wrong to force asmall baby to support themselves when they are not ready. a lot of its down to peer pressure " oh my ds/dd can do this and my ds/dd can say sooooo many words"

Just enjoy her she will come along at her own speed and be so much happier for it x

I agree that competition is a nightmare, but I think that it stems from the insecurity of being a mum for a first time and the fact that almost all first time mums are anxious that they are doing things right for their babies. It seems too simple to say "feed, clothe, shelter and love your baby, and that is all they need in order to develop", so we look around at other families and then question our own judgement. "Why is my baby doing this/not doing that? I must be doing something wrong, surely there is more to it" type thing.

The thing is that being a mother of a baby is HARD, even though the babies needs are simple. It is hard because you are meeting its needs AROUND THE CLOCK. Which means that you are already doing the right things and your baby is developing as it is meant to! All the other stuff is incidental.

"the baby's needs"

Man, I need to go back to school.

custardo lol juggle at birth

with second and third you want to actively discourage walking and crawling and all that stuff

I was practically begging my third not to learn to cruise

they still do it anyway

See, that's why I love custy!