Breastfeed - when is it time to give up? Need advice

[K2012]

Good morning ladies. First time mother and need some advice

Baby boy is 5 weeks old. Straight after my c-section in the recovery room I wanted to start breastfeeding him but he didn’t want to latch and in the days after (I was in hospital for 3 days) he still didn’t want to so midwives said to hand express colostrum and give by syringe. The breastfeeding team came as well to help but he still didn’t want to latch.
I started giving baby formula and was discharged and was advised to buy a electrical breast pump so I’ve been using that since. Now 5 weeks later he still doesn’t want to latch (I’ve tried many times and gave up trying 1-2 weeks ago) so I’m using the pump and giving formula as well.

I must admit don’t get time to pump every 3 hours but try at least 4-5 times a day, I don’t produce much milk. In the morning I will get approx. 10ml in total from both breast and drying the day very little less than 5ml in total.

Are there some women who don’t produce enough breast milk?

I wanted to breastfeed my child but it didn’t work out and I must admit when I only produce very small amounts my question is, is it time to give up and use formula only or is there a chance milk production will increase?

Thank you for reading.

I never had enough breastmilk. I pumped about 6-7 times a day and it started to increase with time (I got around 180 per pump after 2 months but I remember around week 5 I only pumped about 80-90 ml in 24 hours period). So you can still wait and see, mine started to increase very slowly. How long do you pump? I did 40 minutes every time, and twice a day the milk increase technique: pump 20 minutes, break for ten minutes, pump for 10 minutes break again, pump again....and so on for an hour.

I did struggle with breastfeeding too, but thankfully she managed to latch around 8 weeks (always only with nipple shield she couldn't without). She never got enough out, always needed a bottle after, so I mostly used breastfeeding for comfort, and it was a good way for her to sleep during the daytime. It was very exhausting breastfeeding and pumping after every time.
I think it is also good to keep trying, BUT breastmilk is no magic milk, it is more important to spend quality time with your little one! A baby who's in the less stressful surrounding and always fed enough by formula will be a healthier and happier baby than the one whos not fed enough and feel the constant stress. Formula made for exactly reason, it is perfectly fine to give them only that. I was lucky enough as I had a very good sleeper baby and I got loads of help from my husband so I didnt mind trying. But if you feel its extremely exhausting (which is!!!!) do not feel pressured to go on.

Oh and I forgot to mention: my milk went away after 3.5 months, even though I was constantly pumping and breastfeeding.... so again, it was a lot of work and the success didn`t lasted long! 😅

I fully bf all of mine, but when I had to pump I got almost nothing.
The only time it was effective was when baby was feeding at the same time.
Pumping is just not very good at getting your body to make or release milk.

Your baby is being well fed with formula, he is happy and drinking it.
Honestly? Pumping is soul destroying. Stop and enjoy snuggly formula feeds with your baby.

My situation was very similar to yours. I only pumped for about 3 weeks. I have other dc and the rigorous routine of having to lock myself away and pump every few hours just wasn't sustainable around our lifestyle. I was so stressed about it all that I wasn't enjoying my baby. I remember one of the breast feeding ladies telling me that it was ok to stop, that it was more important to be happy and to enjoy my family. Sometimes you just need someone to tell you that.

It sounds like you've given it a really good try. It's hard when they won't latch because you have all the hassle of bottle feeding (sterilising etc) and none of the convenience because you're still having to pump. Do what's right for you and your family.

Has your baby been checked for tongue tie? That’s a very common reason why they can’t latch. If there is a tongue tie - have it resolved and hopefully breastfeeding and milk production will gradually improve.

Gosh, you've tired so hard for so long. If it was me I'd stop. It must be stressful and time-consuming to pump and then bottle feed.

You’ve done so well to get to 5 weeks. Pumping is the worst of both worlds!
If you really want to keep trying I’d recommend seeing an IBCLC, it’s the highest qualification in breastfeeding support. You might be able to get one via your health visitor or might have to go private depending on your area.
If you’re looking for permission to stop then it’s completely ok. You’ve done so much more than most people would do already.

Out of interest @K2012 how much blood did you use during your c-section?

I've exclusively breastfed both babies but I couldn't use a pump at all! Was only getting 5-10 ml from each breast. A lactation consultant told me some women can't pump but it is no reflection on how much milk they produce. Both my babies put on weight exclusively breastfeeding so milk not problem, only pumping. I didn't even bother with a pump this time. However, I'm exhausted breastfeeding so am moving over to formula at 6 months. Don't beat yourself up, formula is great and pumping is hard.

My baby is 5 months now and had the same problems with breastfeeding initially.
The supply went up over time but didn't take as long as you say. By week 3, i was producing over 500ml per day, even though in the hospital i was barely making 20ml per day.
Things that helped:
I used a hospital grade pump. You can rent a medela for 47£/month
Have your shoulders covered by a blanket as you pump (a lactation consultant told me that one, no idea why it works, but it does)
Have something of baby's next to you when you pump. Or even the baby if you can but without the baby crying.
Be stress free-good luck with that one!
Either don't look or cover the bottles with a sock so you don't obsess about how much you produce.

Gently massage the breasts while pumping.

Things that maybe worked...
Eat oats
Buy some lactation tea from Amazon or wherever (I bought a dodgy looking Bulgarian one and it turned out to be great-if nothing else it tastes good).

Overall, like a pp said, expressing is the worst of both worlds. But my opinion is even if you produce just a little, you dc will still get the benefit of your antibodies etc. So keep going if you can. Maybe don't stress so much about the quanity, even one bottle a day is better than none.

As for latching on, I eventually got mine to latch around 3 months ( problem was she was small and my nipples are waaay too big). It only lasted about 1 month though, then I had to stop on advice of a Paediatrician as she wasn't growing properly. So now we are back to expressing. That month was magical though so well worth it!

Best of luck to you, I hope it works out in the end. And remember it does get easier (although it does not feel that way where you are now)