4/5 year old- how much attention do you give them

[OnlyFoolsnMothers]

My soon to be 5yr old is driving me insane, literally not one task can she crack on with alone. Today I’ve had enough and set her down with puzzles and I ended up having to finish it. She’s not a toy girl, likes crafts and going out, but her favourite thing is other people: play dates, talking, attention and I’m at my wits end. She has a sister but her sister is a toddler and not much fun yet.

am I mad or can you leave you 4/5 year old to play and entertain themselves whilst you dare to do your own work/ housework etc?

Depends on the day, but this morning mine has been up for 2.5 hours so far and I have provided food and telly and she has played with her my little ponies, a box of bouncy balls and a little drawing tablet. I helped her draw a picture and she's had two breakfasts and a snack. On another day she can be more needy than this. I've done two hours work today which is great.

Only if you've taught them how. If you've previously indulged their requests and given them constant interaction then it's unrealistic and unfair to expect them to suddenly be able to play independently. It's a learnt skill.

I think some children are just more like this than others. One of mine (but only one) is the same - very sociable, only really interested in play if it’s playing with someone, cannot be in the same room without a constant stream of chatter, age 4-5 even if happily playing couldn’t do it without “mummy look, mummy LOOK, mummy watch this, mummy do you think I should do this or this? Mummy what’s your favourite Pokémon? Mummy let’s do this, mummy look at me look LOOK you weren’t LOOKING.” Meanwhile next child was perfectly happy to potter about independently from toddler age.

I found it helped to split time between explicitly “I am playing with you now” and explicitly “I am doing this other thing now, I can’t play with/chat to/discuss Pokémon with you at the moment.” Saying all right, I’ll play with you for the next X minutes and then I am going to do this other thing.

Yes for us it depends on the day (4y3m) Some days we get some 30 minute stretches where he'll happily play with something, other times its constant "mummy play with me" "mummy why are you not playing with me" "mummy mummy". It does drive me bananas.

I agree with PP it's a learnt skill though so perhaps try a few minutes at a time initially where you busy yourself with something specific?

DS is quite good now when I say I'll wash up and be with him in 10 minutes or so he tends to accept it now and play independently.