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Parenting

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Heart broken teenager

1 reply

DoleWhipFloat · 21/06/2022 16:54

Ok, so firstly, I have so far only bought a McDonalds for the teen in question and said that I’m here for him.

DS (17) has a girlfriend who he adores, but who’s been ‘off’ with him for a few weeks.
Understandably he wants to know what the matter is and has been texting her, despite her clearly not wanting to talk. He’s been to meet her after work when she wasn’t expecting him and come back to the house pretty miserable. I know this, because he sometimes chats to his dad and then his dad tells me. She also ghosted him on his birthday recently and I understand he must feel crappy.

I’ve stayed completely out of it, but yesterday DS left school without permission and missed important coursework lessons, and then lay in bed all day staring out blankly.

I asked if he was Ok and he refused to speak with me…hence I bought the McDonalds and said I was there if he needed me.

He did mention recently that his gf is suffering with her MH and has developed a tic.

On the one hand I’m sympathetic as DS is clearly hurting about something (she hasn’t ended the relationship and they are still together).

But on the other hand, I was internally beside myself with worry when I heard he’d left school suddenly, missing his lessons (I was in work and he wouldn’t take my call).

For those with teens, how do you navigate this? His relationship is already VERY intense and I really wish I could tell him to just chill out a bit and enjoy, but I know he’d get upset if I did. His gf has come over the house much less recently and I hate to think she’s finding it all too intense too.

Tough love? Mind own business? A relaxed chat (which will most definitely not end up relaxed)? Just be there to pick up pieces?
His dad loses patience easily…and says exactly what he thinks…which is not always tactful.

A quietly worrying mum.

OP posts:
Pen89ox · 21/06/2022 19:00

I feel like the best approach is what you’re doing right now, let him know you are totally there for him whether that’s to talk about it or just do something together to try to take his mind off the subject temporarily. At this age I think there’s little point in tough love as such as he’s going to do exactly what he wants/feels he needs to do anyway. Feelings are so intense at that age and especially the first time you feel broken hearted, there’s nothing quite like it.

You sound like an ace mum, he’s lucky to have you :)

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