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Original poster

Any one ever moved a birthday?

37 replies

singleparentdad · 15/01/2008 10:28

Might sound like a ridiculous question, but I'm thinking of moving my Son's birthday. He was born only three days before Christmas, and this year, while he and we had a great time, I couldn't help feel that his birthday may be better celebrated at another time of year.

I sort-of had a crack last year. At latish moment I invited a few of his friends for a 2 & a 1/2 birthday bash. It went really well, but didn't stop the huge follow up and mass of gifts on his actual birthday later in the year. As I hadn't invited all and sundry and neither did I get others to buy into to the fact that this should effectively replace or be his birthday for all intents and purposes.

If I choose to do it this year, I know I must really sell it to others and invite all that would be expected to his party.

Any one else have a Christmas toddler that has done, or thought of doing similar?

Comment welcome here, and here www.singleparentdad.blogspot.com

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mylittleponey · 15/01/2008 10:31

a friend has her sons party in June for school friends & then the family pressies in Jan. Works really well.

Cappuccino · 15/01/2008 10:35

I think this is something that an older child could decide

but isn't it kind of like saying 'oh, your birthday is not very good is it, let's choose another?'

I have a birthday quite near Christmas and it makes it a doubly special time of year. I also have a 3 year old whose birthday just misses Christmas/ New Year by a whisker - this year we asked her if she wanted us to take the tree down to make it her birthday and she was adamant that she wanted the tree, she liked Christmas and thought it was special to have her birthday too. I would never have thought of moving it - it's the day she was born

it's not necessarily dreadful to ahve a birthday at Christmas unless people don't put any effort into it because they see Christmas as the main event

KelaS · 15/01/2008 10:35

When I was little I had a friend whose birthday was 26th December, and she always celebrated on her 'half-birthday', at least with friends; as I was quite young not sure what they did about family pressies, but I think they did the whole thing then, and pretty much ignored her actual birthday. Worked much better for loads of reasons, as June is a much better time to have a party (can go outside etc!), and it is later in the school year so when he gets older her will have a better idea of who he wants to invite I guess.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Events & celebrations Families General parenting

kekouan · 15/01/2008 10:59

My friend at school malways had a half birthday party in the summer, and then presents at Christmas. Worked really well - as long as the presents weren't joint Christmas and Birthday ones (apparently a massive peeve of anybody born near Christmas).

Hulababy · 15/01/2008 11:00

One of DD's friend has her birthday on Christmas Day. Although her immediate family do recognise her birthday, her main birthday celebrations such as her party and big presents are celebrated on June 25th (her half birthday). This appears to work really well for them.

Twiglett · 15/01/2008 11:03

you can't move a birthday but you can move a party you can have 'DS's summer party' .. but his birthday will always be 3 days before christmas and it's rather sad to change it

seeker · 15/01/2008 11:04

My dd was born on 21st December. She has a family birthday on the day, a party sometime in January (when Christmas is over, everyone's back at school and it's cold and dreary - her fiiends always really look forward to her party!). Then on midsummer day, which is her official half birthday, she has one present from us (usually something summery - she's had a paddling pool, a scooter, a tankini - you get the idea) a couple of friends home, a cake and a posh tea (works well for us!) Trouble is, we now have to do the same thing for ds, whose birthday's in February! But we like celebrating things so we don't mind!

Maveta · 15/01/2008 11:06

my birthday is 4 days before xmas and while my parents always offered that I could move it if I wanted, to celebrate it in summer or something, I never did. My birthday is my birthday, you can´t move it!! I love having my birthday near xmas, it makes the whole period really special. My parents never put up decorations or the tree until after my birthday and always always ALWAYS kept presents separate. Have never understood people saying "oh, so do you just get joint xmas/ birthday presents then?" um, no, do you??

I think you should celebrate on or near his birthday and offer him the choice when he is older.

mumblechum · 15/01/2008 11:12

DS's friend has a 23 Dec birthday and has always celebrated it on 23rd June. He has a full monty birthday with party, presents etc and on his real birthday just gets a card and v. small pres from parents.

Seems to work v. well

barbamama · 15/01/2008 11:15

I'm really interested to read this as my 3 yr old birthday is a couple of days after christmas (due date was Christmas Day so could have been worse). I was really wondering as time has gone on about the feasibility of recognising it at some other time of the year. We put a huge amount of effort into his birthday to make it special and distinct from Christmas but there are 2 issues - firstly I think it is a bit too much for him and he gets "presented-out" and secondly, to be honest, the last 2 years Christmas, his family party on the day and his friends party on the next Saturday after Xmas have damn near killed me, especially this year with a young baby who was sick - and lots of his friends couldn't come too as everyone is ill at this time of year aren't they.

I too feel it is wrong to actually move his birthday - that was when he was born and it was a very special (and intense) time being in hospital over Xmas and New Year. My Mum kept saying to move it to the same date in June (which is my late Fathers birthday so kind of fitting). But it never occurred to me that the ideal thing is to do the friends party in June - especially when he starts school and then just a small family one after Xmas. What a good idea. Do you think 3 and a half next year will be too young for him to understand this? Will people resent getting him more presents when they have just bought them at Christmas?

Kewcumber · 15/01/2008 11:15

My ds's birthday is end Nov and I do find that swiftly followed by Xmas means he gets a lot of stuff in one go. He's only 2 so not such a big problem at the moment but a friend suggested we have Easter presents/celebration for him to spread the presents out a bit which I quite like the idea of.

Issy · 15/01/2008 11:21

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at OP's request

barbamama · 15/01/2008 11:24

Another good idea. You will find it gets worse every year in terms of the amount of presents. We both come from big famillies with lots of cousins and everyone plus NCT and nursery friends etc buy things for him. And everyone is careful to buy him 2 presents, one for Xmas and one for birthday as that is frowned upon, as pointed out here, so once a year he seriously gets nearly 100 presents.

I find it a bit overwhelming in terms of suddennly having to absorb all those extra things in the playroom (or playrooms, I had to turn the dining room into one too this year as he got a toy cooker and dolls house!) and it feels a bit OTT in terms of commerciality - esp at Xmas when you think of all the children going without in the world. Then I feel bad for being ungrateful. This year we really felt it was too much for him too. One thing that did help was that we put the birthday presents away straight after his party and then opened one a day over the next couple of weeks, Also I have put some things away to bring out over the next few months. As someone said, this is all his presents for a whole year (though I always end up buying him summer presents as well for the garden even though I say I won't).

Original poster

singleparentdad · 15/01/2008 12:21

Thanks for all the responses. They kind of firm up my idea to have a June 'party'. I was never intending to ignor his birthday, more make it a small family thing with less presents. Pleasing to hear that others have done the same thing for their young ones, and when he's old enough he can decide, if we contiue with the summer party or try to make it on or very near his birthday.

At the moment I'm pretty sure, given the option, he would say both!

OP posts:

BabiesEverywhere · 15/01/2008 12:38

My birthday is November and my sister is August.

My parents for several years (I think when I was 5 to 9 years old) held a joint summer birthday party with all our friends and we would get our big present off my parents. i.e. Second hand bikes, rollerskates, dad made play shed etc.

But we each had our own small family tea and a small inexpensive gift on our actual birthday day.

Worked well for us but when I got older I wanted to have my own party on my own birthday date.

Chaotica · 15/01/2008 12:57

A friend of mine always has two birthdays ("like the queen...") due to being born on 26th december - he moves his second one around to suit good party dates and I think his family have done this since he was a child.

Riddo · 15/01/2008 13:03

My ds bd is in Feb. Last year because my mother was very ill, we postponed his party to the summer when he had a water fight party. It worked really well as he had family presents on his birthday and then friends presents later so he appreciated them a lot more and most of the party took place in the garden. He only had one party and I put "postponed" on the invites to make it clear.

Tutter · 15/01/2008 13:07

my bday is new years day

yes i think it's a shite birthday, but that's the one i have

i wouldn't change the celebration of his birthday to another time - just think it's a bit wierd tbh - but why not have a 'family party' in the summer each year

there are advantages to having a bday around christmas too - often family members are off work, and you get extra excited about christmas, if that's possible

OrmIrian · 15/01/2008 13:09

I've thought about it for DS#1. His b'day is on 4th January so right at the ar*e end of Christmas and often on or near the day they go back to school. I offered to throw his party in the summer or Easter hols but he turned me down .

EachPeachPearMum · 15/01/2008 13:11

my brother and I have our birthdays close to christmas. My parents always celebrated our 'un-birthday's- 6 months after our birthdays, to give us a little treat.

sagitta · 15/01/2008 13:17

We've decided to have a party for DD (2) in the summer so that her presents are spread better through the year. We had a tiny birthday celebration this year, just the three of us, and then we'll do something fun in June.
I can't decided whether to have a fixed date each year, though, or just go with whatever is convenient...

MargoWishesYouAHappyNooNooYear · 15/01/2008 13:27

I've always moaned about having my birthday so near christmas. In our family DD1 & DH have their birthday in August and September. Mine and dd2s are in December.

We're not having a celebration in December this year except for Christmas, although we will do something special on dd2s birthday each year and celebrate it with a party 6 months later.

I don't mind being 6 months younger either

PrettyCandles · 15/01/2008 13:34

My dd has a similar birthday to your ds. We've always celebrated her birthday near the actual date, but now that she is 5 - and has opinions on how to clebrate her birhday - I'm trying to sell her on having a 'Queen's Birthday'. Ie we would have a small family celebration on the day itself, as we always do, with only mummy and daddy giving her presents, but the party itself would be in the summer, and that would be when all her friends would give her presents. She's quite interested in the idea, especially as it means that the weather allows more options for the party.

My birthday is in the spring, but when I was little my party was almost always delayed until summer so that it could be outdoors. I don't recall ever having any problem with that, TBH I think may even have felt exra-special as I had effectively two birthdays.

bluebell1 · 15/01/2008 17:36

My ds birthday is on christmas eve.I too am a single parent and found it too hard entertaining on both christmas eve and day.I think this year i will give him a half birthday but then do i give him presents for both birthdays as ds2 wouldnt be too impressed with that.

sophy · 15/01/2008 18:52

My birthday is on dec 22nd. I have only thought about changing the date very recently -- so have celebrated 44 birthdays 3 days before Christmas without a hitch!

Am now thinking that just once I would like to have an excuse for a summer party -- maybe when I am 50.

I think your actual birthday is a special day and shouldn't be messed around. Everyone has always been very sensitive to the fact that I shouldn't get a joint present, except when I've wanted something big (like a computer or when I was 18 I got a moped!). In fact I probably ended up with more presents because people who knew us would be more likley to rememvber my birthday because it was close to xmas.

When i was young we always got the xmas tree on my birthday -- it became part of the ritual. When I was grownup DH and I would use my birthday as an excuse to kick off the xmas marathon of eating and drinking with a slap up lunch with friends, wh didn't mind taking the time off work because it was nearly xmas. Downside of pre-xmas birthday was that places are often full of people celebrating their office parties.

The other good thing was that having a birthday so close to xmas meant it was always in the school holidays. In fact I think I have only ever had to go to work once on my birthday.

So my advice would be stick with the date you have and make the most of it.

And remember to book party entertainers up well in advance because they get very busy in december!

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