Living with partners child 100% and my own child 50%

[mattdad123]

I have a 4 year old son with my ex partner. We co parent very well (mostly) and there are no feelings there. Our son is cared for 50/50 and we both have a great relationship with him.

I have a new partner of 8 months, she has a 3 year old son whose father is not in the picture, so she has him 100% of the time. This doesn't really cause any issues with us seeing each other, we both work and have our own lives and things are going really well.We have spoken about moving in together and thats probably the trajectory within months.

I’m struggling with the situation that I will be living with her son 100% of the time, and my own only 50%. And with my partner's son having no father figure, that would become me, which I knew from day 1 and am fine with. I've grown to love her son, he is great and we get on well.

However I’m concerned how this will affect the relationship with my son, how he will view me spending more time with another child over him, whether I will resent spending more time with my partner's child, how my son may not feel a full part of a family who live together and he’s just a visitor half of the time.

I’m trying to not feel like an awful person for feeling like this, but I’m wondering whether I’m not cut out for that type of family scenario.

Any thoughts / opinions would be great.

I thought Cinderella's step mum was a caricature, perhaps not.

Says a great deal abut the stability of 'blended' families, as presumably OP would be entitled to see his new partners son as less than his own.

Does this also go for adoptive children? Are they second class children?

I always took the view that children worm their way into your heart, you can love them differently but not less.

OP I wouldn't worry too much, obviously your ex has moved on with her new partner and doesn't see a problem so why should you. The problems that really screw you up are the ones you can't foresee so just grab what chance of happiness you get while you can. Another child comes along he may have to get a smaller room, well tough, that happens in any family when children grow.