Nursery Confusion

[Teaspoon8]

I’m currently pregnant with my first baby and due very soon. My husband and I are currently looking around nurseries as waiting lists are already very long!

So far we’ve seen two nurseries and feel very confused and overwhelmed trying to make a decision about which we prefer. For those of you with children at nurseries and knowing what’s worked well/not worked well for you, I was wondering what you thought of these two scenarios?:

Number 1 has an Ofsted rating of ‘Outstanding’ and Number 2 has ‘Good’. There is a cost difference of £20 per day (only £8 per day when comparing exact same hours but Number 2 has more flexibility for pick up times and therefore cost).

Both nurseries had very different vibes. Number 1 one was very clean, calm and organised but they were less forthcoming with some of the info, in particular when talking about development and activities. We had to ask about that. Number 2 was more messy/less clean, chaotic and tired but had quite a nice ‘energy’ and buzz about it and the staff were more forthcoming with info and paid more attention with talking about development. Answers were similar and comparable overall though - but don’t know if it’s a reflection of their priorities?

Thoughts? What made you choose your nursery?

Honestly, where I live you go where there is a space…

Honestly, my first criteria was location and flexibility around hours (so long as they weren't shitholes). In the end, we went with a nursery that sounds more like your #2 and it's been great for DS. I don't massively care about Ofsted ratings; my DS' nursery was marked down because they didn't have learning objectives (or whatever the term is) for when they're playing outside. I mean they run around a park kicking a football and poking things with sticks. It's all good.

We saw an 'outstanding 'nursery attached to a private school and a 'good' independent run by three sisters. We picked the 'good' one.

It jut had a much nicer vibe to it. It was smaller, only 30 kids maximum in a day, and was all an open space, so babies and older kids were in the same general area, just behind a stairgate. The staff were engaged and interested whereas the ones at the 'outstanding' nursery looked a bit disinterested and were all very young (not a problem on its own, but they all seemed to be recent school leavers whereas the one we picked has a nice mix of some older more experienced workers and young ones). The rooms and equipment at the 'outstanding' nursery seemed a bit tired and clinical, whereas the nursery we picked had really tried to make it warm and with home comforts.

But mostly I just left feeling like it was the right place for DD. The first place I felt uneasy about. There was nothing that was a red flag and on paper it was great, but I didn't leave feeling that it was right for DD. When we went to see her current nursery, I actually felt emotional when we left because it felt so perfect for her.

I would go with nice vibe.

Whats your gut instinct?

Go with the one that is either closer or has better hours for your work.

For first baby you notice this kind of stuff, for anything after first baby you basically care that they keep them alive and give you the right child at the end of the day. Good is fine. Outstanding is a bonus.

You can look up the Ofstead reports online and see the full report, also the date of inspection and if its recent enough to be particularly relevant. I’d personally put the biggest importance on the vibe, flexibility of hours and convenience of location. Also, we sent DD to a Good nursery and it was re inspected not longer after she started and was upgraded to Oustanding… so I would have been kicking myself if we’d turned it down for that alone.

I agree I think vibe is important but what do you do if you like both. Both were nice - just different! Buzzy vs. Calm. And I'm not sure which is better haha!

I think it’s a really hard decision when you don’t know what personality your child has, my first needed calm and quiet where as my second preferred loud and messy, with it being your PFB I’d go for quiet and clean.

It's tricky isn't it, had a similar dilemma recently about which school to choose!

I would go for the one where the staff was more forthcoming. In my experience that's all that matters at that age, that the staff enjoy their job and really care for the children.

I didnt like any of the nurseries we saw for DD, just picked one because I had to. It happened to have an outstanding rating but was messy and chaotic.

In the end it's been amazing because the staff treat the children like their own family, it's so lovely. They just need to be loved at that age. There won't be much difference in play/learning in 'good vs 'outstanding'. And you'll save some money too!

I’d go for the one with staff who are more forthcoming. When my baby started at nursery I had a 1000 questions a day, what she ate, sleep, mood, what she did. I was anxious and struggling and needed staff who could talk and give me answers.
Do they have similar set ups in terms of where the children sleep, eat, play? We wanted a separate sleep room as opposed to mats on the floor (DD is poor sleeper)
You could ask to do another visit at the outstanding nursery in case you caught staff on a stressful day? Maybe they will be more open with information.
Also, a little dirt never hurt anyone. My DD has never been sick, no antibiotics, no temps, no GP visits. Runny nose now and then and a cough but all goes in a few days. I keep my home clean, probs too clean (OCD) so I’m glad she is exposed to a bit of ‘life’ at nursery. Could be unrelated but I like to think she’s building immunity!

Don’t underestimate the importance of location, opening hours and ease of drop off/pick up. You will going to this place twice a day! But if both are equal read the reports and then go with instinct - everything you have written suggests you prefer the feel of the second one.

It depends on your child really, but a calm one is a safer bet. Location would be my deciding factor, you will have to collect the child on short notice when sick, you will need quick drop off and pick up when rushing to/from work, and you will need flexibility at times. I would completely not care about activities and education, it's a nursery, they will eat dirt and roll in coloured glitter no matter what Ofsted rating they have.

I had A v similar choice to make. I chose the second one with no regrets. The flexivilty was great and it felt homely with the kids and a bit of chaos. They actually refurbished not long after we started so it was a great choice.

We have just been through exactly the same scenario. First baby and needed to consider our options for when I return to work.
We looked at 5 nurseries.
One was an immediate no as soon as we walked through the door. It was dark, dirty, not enough staff to children ratio, the rooms were over crowded and we just didnt like it. It was Ofsted rated good.
We were stuck between 2 in the end.

One was rated Ofsted outstanding and one good.
The good one was lovely. Family run, homely feel, lots of lovely facilities, all staff very welcoming. Only downside was it was a little further from home and if we had to get there urgently it would still take over 30mins.
The Outstanding one was very similar to the good rated one but had alot more space and more of a school feel to it. It was much closer to home though. Staff all very lovely. Kids seemed happy in both.
It was so hard to decide.
We literally drew up a spreadsheet and took into consideration the costs too.
Ofsted report aside (as both were similar) we went with the one closer to home.
Location came out on top at the end of the day.
It was the most expensive nursery for us but having somewhere we liked that is so close to home was important.
I guess in a few months we will find out how much we like it and whether we made the right decision.

We were told youll just know when you find the right one and we did.

Did you view them when the children were there?

I've worked in EYFS settings and I love seeing children free to explore, have fun, make a bit of a mess!

For us, development was important as DS has been behind on his speech. His small, slightly-chaotic, bit-messy nursery in a little pre-fab building has been wonderful at helping him progress. Not saying he wouldn't have got help at a different nursery, but at his they've always taken on board what needs to be done and are always happy to discuss him and his progress with me or his dad.

Bear in mind that, especially due to the pandemic, nurseries may have gained their Ofsted labels as long ago as 2014.