Ds1 is 2 in April, is it to early to start potty training? Feeling pressured by rest of family to do it!

[fifisworld]

He hasnt really given any indication that he's ready to use a potty, but to be fair we havent really tried yet as ive just had ds2 5 weeks ago so didnt want to start before he was born.
Sil bought a potty for ds1 a couple of months ago and has dropped hints that he should be using it and has bought him underwear.

i really dont know what to do or where to start. We are going away in April for a few days for his birthday and odnt know if i should start now before we go or wait.
Can anyone give me some help and advice please??#

dd3 is 2 at the end of april and I dont intend to start until teh summer

wait and enjoy your break. can't believe people can't see how rude they're being. It's hardly like he's at school. surely it'll be easier when he is ready rather than forcing it

I agree with ginger - you have to wait until they're ready. There's no harm in having a potty there and letting him know what it's for. If he wants to use it he will if not then don't force it. There's no rush and certainly shouldn't be any pressure on you or ds.

Don't feel pressured you must wait till you and your ds are ready, my dd2 was 2 in dec and i'm not going to bother till warmer weather comes, maybe summer hols. Especially as you have young baby to care for doesn't give you much time, you have enough to do, i would wait!! Okay chick take it easy!

We introduced the potty as an interesting thing that DS might like to consider sitting on from time to time, but left "training" until he had (a) started to ask to use it, and (b) started to so some vague correlation between asking to use it and actually producing something. In practice this was when he was around 2.8 -- he had around one accident a day for a couple of weeks and then was sorted.

Buy your SIL some skimpy underwear, some "marital aids" and a copy of The Joy Of Sex (or something). Her sex life is just as much your business as how you potty train your child is hers.

Having a new baby in the house is not a good time to potty train, however old your child.

P.S. Has your SIL shown any previous signs of hating you? Surely no one can be so crass as not to see how rude that behaviour is?

lol portlemonaid
With her its always ' my dd did was doing that by the time she was his age'

I dont think he's ready, think i will wait until the summer. or at least after our hols, but i'll leave the potty out for him so he gets used to it.

oops - PortAndLemonaid

Tell SIL where to go and do it when your DS is ready not when your SIL is.

try him and see how he goes, I was dry day and night by 18 months and ds is dry all day and has just turned 2. But friends ds is nearly 4 and still has a nappy most of the time so we are all different

Not unheard of I'm sure but IME too young.

Rule one of being a mother: (a) ignore everything anyone ever suggests and go with gut instinct and/or (b) ask MN and see what suits you

If you do it too early PTing will take ages and be a real pain.

Wait for your child to be ready and demonstrating some understanding/willingness and it could well be a doddle. We followed DD's lead, let her take charge and it was over and done with in 3 days.

Watch your child and see what hints he is giving you. Most children are somewhere between the ages of 2 and 3, some either side.

Nothing wrong with having the potty around though, mayb even letting hi have a sit on it and play with it, etc. so he s used to what it is and what it is for.

And, ignore the family!

Too young IMHO.

Tell SIL to butt out. Girls are different.

I waited till DS was ready and he was 2.10. Took less than a week.

Within a month he was dry at night as well.

With ds we got him used to sitting on potty morning and night when he was still in a nappy - we had quite a selection of books in the bathroom at one time so that he didn't see it as a chore. We established this before he was 2 with no problem - he pottytrained himself at 2.2 effectively over a weekend so I didn't need to take off the anticipate week off work to sort out - from what I've picked up, if you leave it until they are ready its much easier, and quite often ds's take longer than dds (I think ds was quite early partly due to washable nappies...)

Don't feel pressurised into trying when you and your ds aren't ready

Best of luck

DS was toilet trained late. Showed no interest in the potty. Then trained in a couple of days when he was ready. He was 3. Girls tend to train earlier.

We made it clear what the potty was for and read some potty training stories.

Try your best to ignore the pressure. It's hard though. When we were out well meaning elderly neighbours kept commenting on the fact he was still in nappies.

I agree, it not a good time with a new baby, and its none of your SILs business, although perhaps she thinks she is being helpful?

Having said that - my ds will be 2 in march, has been dry at clean home from 16 months, and is now almost dry when we are out and about - we have the odd accident, but he generally asks to go. So it can be done. We never forced or punished him, it was something he was ready for, and which we encouraged.

Its something that varies so much from child to child,and from family to family. You shouldn't feel pressured by your family, its fine to wait.

If it weren't for the fact that it wouldn't be fair on your little ds, the next time sil brings the matter up I'd be tempted to say:

"Yes sil, you're right. It's time he was in pants. But because I have a newborn and a toddler to deal with, why don't you take ds1 for the weekend and see how YOU get on with training him. You seem to know so much more about it than me..."

Thanks for all your replies

miobombino - PMSL at that

I've had a word with dp about it and he agrees that he doesnt think ds is quite ready yet, although ive been leaving the potty lying round for him to get used to.
We are going to see if he shows any signs over the next few weeks but im not pushing him to do it. If not we are going to wait until dp is off work at easter so at least one of us can look after ds2 while we concentrate on getting him potty trained.

Tom is also 2 in April. MIL has him sat on a potty at theirs occasionaly and has him in boxer shorts. I sometimes put him in pants around the house. But he's showed no signs that he is ready, although he's very interested in loo paper (Andrex dog advert springs to mind) and does pass me bits when i'm on the loo!

I think at least one of the mums at toddlers, whose DS is also 2 in April, has started. I overhead her saying last week.

2 is too young IMO. We showed DS the potty at about 2 and a half - no interest whatsoever so we put it away and I bought a child seat that slots into the toilet and a step and just left them by the toilet. Regularly telling him what they were for. When he was three he was wandering around without a nappy on and I was in the bathroom. He came in and I asked if he needed the loo and suggested he try the seat. He put it on the toilet, used it and never wore a nappy again - except at night for two weeks after which I stopped because he was dry every morning. I firmly believe that children will do it when they are ready. Dont really understand this mad desire to get them "trained" at the earliest age possible.

Was always very conscientious about him going to the toilet before we went anywhere and taking him to the toilet after meals or snacks out. The only time he ever had an accident was when out with DH who forgot to take him to the toilet after they had been swimming and then had a snack.