My 7 year old has been constantly anxious about meeting people and friends. Even anxious about going to her best friends house. She starts feeling hot and sweaty and straight away vomits if she knows that she is meeting a friend. She has been best friends with this girl in her school since 4 years. They are in the same class since reception, they go to the same dance class and are practically with each other at each other’s houses every weekend. Most weekends first thing in the morning she says is can i meet her today. But if i say yes you can then she starts getting anxious about it and wouldn’t eat her breakfast and lunch. If she manages to eat something she gets so anxious that most of the time she vomits. If she hasn’t eaten well then she is nauseous and stars to feel like throwing up but manages to not vomit but she hasn’t eaten. Although on the contrary I have noticed that if she is confident that she is not meeting her friend at their house or if she is not coming over then she eats happily without feeling anxious or the need to throw up. After her lunch is over she herself starts asking that please can I meet my friend and if at that point i agree that ok you can meet then nothing happens.
Also whenever she is going on a school trip she is extremely happy and excited about it. But from previous day itself she will stop eating and if asked to eat starts feeling as if she is going to throw up. Same thing on the very morning of the trip she is very excited and happy to go to the trip but as soon as it’s breakfast time she can’t eat anything due to anxiousness.
Also on exciting occasions like Christmas party at school or the recent queen’s jubilee celebration at school she was the same. Will be counting days for the party but as soon as the day arrives she starts getting the feeling of anxious ness and doesn’t want to eat a single bite.
I can’t tell her of any plans about going to a park or a friends place as then she stops eating completely or even if she manages to eat she will take hours to eat less than half of what she eats. Also she will be a complete different person and will get very quiet and hardly be playful if knows we are going to an outing with someone. Also the same if we are going away on holidays. She wouldn’t want to eat the whole day before we need to catch a flight. Even though she will be happy for going on the holiday. However one thing I noticed recently is when her friend had chicken pox and we were not able to meet for a few weeks but i used to take her out everyday to parks, musuems, etc. She never was anxious even when we decided in the morning before breakfast or lunch and would happily eat and be ready to go.
Even though she wants to meet her friend everyday and is adamant on meeting her everyday whenever i say to her in the morning or before lunch that ok you can go to her house or she can come to ours she keeps getting worried and doesn’t want to eat. Also many times when her friends have plans and we are not planning to meet she still says i know she might be coming and i am worried so while having food she will keep on asking that “I won’t vomit right” .
This is usually worse during the school holidays. I am really exhausted trying to keep any plans about going out a secret and then her not eating proper food at meal Times due to all this stress. This is all affecting her as then she is having constant leg pain at night due to not having proper food. Also it is very stressful for me living in constant fear that she will vomit whatever she has eaten.
Sorry for the long post but any suggestions for this would be really helpful.
Thanks