Getting my ducks in a row before #2

[happypaps]

I have a 16 month old DS and I'm expecting #2 who is due as my son turns 2.

My DS still breastfeeds all night cosleep and does not sleep through. I'm really panicking that it doesn't feel as if I have long to sort his sleep out.

I want to move Ds to a double bed in his own room and get him used to sleeping there. He hates his cot!

Would also like to stop feeding...

Has anyone coslept with two children?

Has anyone else been in this situation?

Am I just panicking and overthinking and it'll all just work out?

Is there anything else I need to be considering to get organised with #2 on the way? I feel like I've forgotten everything and not sure where to start.

I feel exhausted enough with one non sleeping child.....

Bump :)

I’m you but a few months down the line. I night weaned DD at 17 months whilst continuing to cosleep. She was furious for a couple of nights but it didn’t take her long to accept a cuddle instead of a boob for night wakes.
Ive not stopped feeding completely so still do morning and usually one in the afternoon and bedtime if it’s my turn (DH and I alternate) so can’t advise on the day weaning other than to use distraction and cuddles as much as possible.

Once we’d night weaned we swapped her to cosleeping with DH rather than me whilst we sorted out her room.

We got her a double floor bed and DH moved in there with her for the first week or two until she got used to it, now he only goes in if she wakes in the night. I’d say unless she’s ill (when it all goes to shit) she now sleeps through 3 out of 4 nights and just toddles in to our room in the morning when she wants to get up (which is adorable)

DH is in charge of all night wakes now and has been for a few months as I know I won’t manage 2 at night and we didn’t want to make the change too close to DC2 being born. Frankly he’s had a good deal as I did almost every night wake up until night weaning and she slept a lot worse then! I think he’s starting to appreciate how much I took one for the team back then!

He cosleeps with her if she won’t settle (I secretly like it as I sleep so badly when pregnant I prefer having the bed to myself!)

@SamanthaVimes this is amazing advice thank you. I think you've nailed what we need to do tbh. Going to show my DH your post! I hope you are feeling ok and enjoying the extra sleep xx

Good luck!

Cosleeping with a newborn and a toddler is very dangerous, please do not do this.

You're not overthinking though, you definitely need to fix with before baby arrives, and the sooner the better. SO I would do it in the following stages.

1. Get the bed set up in DS's room and sleep in there with him for a week.

1. Assuming your DS feeds to sleep, I'd get him used to feeding to sleep in his bed in his room, and then leave him there, go back in when he wakes, feed to sleep again, and leave again. Do this for a few days.

1. Stop feeding to sleep overnight. Go in, give him a cuddle, a sip of water, whatever it takes, but do not feed. This might take a while to crack but DO NOT GIVE IN. This is where Dad comes in - you might find it's much, much easier for your DH to settle him without boob.

1. Stop feeding to sleep at bedtime. This can be quick and loud, or slow and gentle. Do a bit of research, find a method that feels right for you as a family, and STICK TO IT.

1. Stop daytime feeds. Distract distract distract!

You've got this OP, congrats on your babies, having 2 is incredible.