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Single mums of one son

1 reply

SaintVal · 01/06/2022 07:50

If you are a single mum to one DS, do you feel you have a special type of bond? My exH left when our DS was 2 and that was nearly six years' ago. My son is my little buddy and we are so close.

His Dad is very much involved in his life, lives in a big house, career has taken off and earns good money. He's taking DS to Mauritius this summer on a family holiday, he's had trips to expensive London museums and in July, they're going off to the Grand Prix. These things are all way out of my league and although I'm happy DS gets to experience all these things, I sometimes wonder if I'm going to 'lose' him to his Dad and that terrifies me. I think I know I have to get over this feeling but I don't know how. It's typical of me to start worrying about something that's not even happened but it's a nagging feeling that my DS will prefer to be with his Dad one day and I do read threads on here about this a lot.

My exH has little empathy and extremely selfish in character. Trust me, he smiles and makes the right noises but he doesn't care one bit about me and by that, I mean in terms of my role as his son's mother. I often wonder if he wouldn't care if I just disappeared. I am the fly in the ointment.

DS never complains about our cheaper days out and we always thoroughly enjoy ourselves. He's with his Dad 8-10 nights' a month which includes every other weekend so I do the majority of the school run, dentist, doctor and hospital appointments. It just seems Dad gets to turn up all smiles and off they go on their jollies.

Anyway, sorry I have gone on a bit. I know that ultimately DS is going to make his own way in life and it's my job to give him the life skills to do that but I still worry he will be 'seduced' by the sparkle of his Dad's life.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
LisaSimpson77 · 01/06/2022 07:56

I'm in exactly the same position op, on my own with ds, limited money. Well off dad takes him on lots of holidays. I also work long hours as a teacher whilst his dad doesn't need to work. So I'm permanently knackered whilst his dad has the time, energy and money to be fun dad. Life's not fair and yes I do worry. All you can do it hope that in time they see how hard you worked to make things good for them and that they'll love you for who you are.
Ds is sweet at the moment but I assume I'll get it thrown back in my face a lot when he's a teenager.

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